


In the Archer's Arms

by Little_Firestar84



Category: Hawkeye (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Romance Novel, Awesome Natasha Romanov, Barney is a silly but good brother, Camping, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Cupid Tony, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fishing, Insecurity, Meddling Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Natasha plays cupid, Sisters, Work In Progress, alternative universe, jersey devil, surrogate brother Tony Stark, widower Clint Barton
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-12-07
Packaged: 2019-07-14 00:24:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 27,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16029149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Little_Firestar84/pseuds/Little_Firestar84
Summary: After the loss of his wife, Clint barton swore off love and women in general. Dating? The last of his thoughts. After all, who had time to date when they were busy running around saving the world on a regular basys?Her whole life, Amanda Heart had always been defined by others - her beauty queen mother, her scientist father, her gorgeous sister. She knew she was a geeky tomboy, and didn't care. After all, who wanted to loose time with men, when they could work alongside none other than Tony Stark and change the world for the better?Still, after a chance encounter, Clint and Amanda's paths keep crossing- and neither of them seems able to keep the other out of their minds, nor capable of admitting that maybe, just maybe, there could be something more than a blooming friendship between them...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There, I'm doing it. Giving Clint some love. Or maybe not. We'll see...

Amanda Hart hadn’t lifted her eyes from Dr. Cho’s latest publication in over two hours. Although partly disowned from the scientific community after the whole Ultron debacle, her research on synthetic tissue technology was still decades ahead of anything Amanda had ever heard of – on pair, probably, only with Tony’s Nano-particles.

_ It’s Mister Stark for you now,  _ she reminded herself. It didn’t matter if she had known Tony for her whole thirty-two years of life – he was her boss now, not her godparents’ son. She hadn’t asked him for a job – she had done things the way normal people did. Saw the ad for the position, filled all the necessary paperwork, presented her curricula, references… everything and anything she could think of, minus telling her surrogate older brother of sort, of course. After a first selection, an interview, another couple of selections and at least three other interviews, HR had, _finally_ , hired her – and when Tony had found out that _she_ had gotten the job in research, he had been a little… disappointed. Or maybe, he had been just _annoyed_ that she hadn't gotten directly to him first. 

_ If you wanted to work here all you had to do was ask. You’re family, Mandy, and more than qualified for this position – and you know how much the name Heart still means to the community,  _ he had told her an evening, after havingsuddenly showed up for a late drink.But Amanda hadn’t wanted to get the job because of her name, or because Tony fancied himself her not-so-figurative knight in shining armor. __

She had wanted to _earn_ it – and earn it she did. In the weeks since her hiring, she had always showed up early, gone home for last, and given even more than what she was asked for. In a matter of days, the people who knew her to be an acquaintance of the “main man” hadstopped whispering not so covertly at her back. Michael Heart, her father, had been a brilliant scientist, and his developments in mechatronic had been amazing in his days. Married to a real beauty – who was rumored to be a former pageant queen – it was clear that Amanda was all her father, with a big brain but a little awkward and a disputable taste when it came to her figure.

“What the hell is this smell?!”At the sound of the masculine voice, Amanda jumped, rattled, letting the scientific publication flew in the air. She couldn’t know for sure, but, sniffing the air, she guessed it was tea – _her tea._ The kettle she had put on before she started reading about the intricacies of self-regeneration induced processes. Over two hours before.

Who thought that a kettle could make so much smoke – and so smelling?

“No. No. No. No. No!” She immediately jumped to open the large window of the kitchenette on the fifth floor at Avengers Tower, moving quickly. She turned on her heels to take care of the kettle, but the man had already done it for her, tossing it into the skink and cooling it down with running water.

Amanda grimaced, pulling the end of her ponytail tight as her heavy glasses were falling on her nose. She bit her lips, unable to look at the very good looking man in front of her – he emanated an aura of power and strength, his biker black jacket covered broad shoulders, and fell open revealing a lavender t-shirt. Amanda swallowed, taking in every detail of the man, from his boots (Chelsea, black, size eleven or twelve) to his well-worn washed jeans to his face. His skin was slightly tanned, and laugh lines accented the corner of his eyes. The blonde stubble on his chin and cheekbones showed that he hadn’t shaved that day. He was, if she had to guess, in his late thirties, early forties at worse.

“Hey, what died here?” As soon as he entered the room, Tony sniffed the air, grimacing. When he finally got close enough to Clint and Amanda, his eyes fell on the remains of the kettle, in the sink, still fuming. “Geez Mandy…. Leave it to you to think of smoke to get people’s attention…”

The handsome stranger – as Amanda had taken to refer to the man who had found her and the burning kettle- locked his gaze with her, and lifted an eyebrow, studying her. Tony, witnessing the scene, blinked, and cleared his throat, suddenly feeling like a third wheel. 

“Barton, my good, old friend Amanda Heart from LA. Mandy- Clint Barton. He is the guy who fights alongside super-soldiers, inhumans, alien gods, billionaires and soldiers in techno-armors… with a bow and arrows.” 

Suddenly, under the scrutiny of this man, Amanda was aware of how much she didn’t fit it, how different she was from the rest of her family: her mother used to be a beauty queen, but her younger daughter was nothing but a geeky tomboy with old, faded jeans and an old t-shirt at least two seizes too big, wearing tennis shoes. Ellison, Amanda’s older sister, on the other hand, wouldn’t have looked bad at the arm of any of the Avengers. Of course Tony had eyes only for Pepper nowadays, but it didn’t take a genius to get that Amanda was, more or less, a _child_ in her friend’s eyes. She just didn’t have to appeal to be the kind of girl Tony used to hang around with before discovering that monogamy wasn’t so bad.

“LA, uh? What brings you here?” He raised a brow.

Amanda’s distracted gaze took in his large hands. They looked very… capable.  “I…  Ah, I’m working with Tony- with Stark – on an old research or Cho. I did a study on techno-organic materials that would cross-over just nicely with her work.”

Clint smiled, grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and gave her a small salute. “Well, nice meeting you Amanda Heart. Good work, and stay safe.”

“Ah, um, yes. Thank you.” Amanda muttered, her face heating at the sound of her name on his lips. Her gaze following him out of the room. Charming- it was the first word that popped into Amanda’s head.Clint Barton was charming _,_ far too much for her own good. 

_ That man, he can be a dangerous man,  _ she thought to herself, as an oblivious Tony was looking at her like she was some kind of alien creature he had just discovered or she was doing something utterly stupid or out of character. _I can assure you, Clint Barton – I’m gonna stay out of your way._

_ *** _

“So, I’ve heard of a damsel in distress who’s been saved by our intrepid hero…” When, a few hours later, Clint entered the gym ready to go and spend some time with a punching bag, he found Nat already waiting for him. Dressed in sport gear, her long, red hair arranged in a messy bun, she was leaning against a wall, her arms crossed in front of her. She was enjoying looking at Barnes and Steve sparring on the ring.

“It was just a kettle, Nat.”

Nat narrowed her eyes. “Tony says that he thinks that you two really hit it off.”

“And in over ten years, you still haven’t learnt to _not_ trust Tony Stark? I swear, he gets us more in trouble than Fury and Coulson put together in all of our years at SHIELD !”

“C’mon Clint, like Tony wasn’t your friend…”

Clint scratched the back of his head. His eyes went to the floor, and he took a big breath. “I don’t know, Nat. I mean, Tony and I, we sued to be friends, but… let’s be honest, if it weren’t for you or Steve, I don’t think I would still be an Avenger.”

Nat clicked her tongue against her cheek, lifting, very elegantly, an eyebrow. She smirked, shaking her head, her deep green eyes shining like emeralds. “What, the whole futurist who knows better than anyone thing? Pretty sure he forgave you, like, five minutes later. Who do you think put in a good word for you at the trial, uh?”

Clint grunted in response, his mood moving south. Not even seeing Barnes punched repeatedly by Steve seemed to make things better. Yes, Tony had helped out at the trial, and yes, the archer still had a place among Earth’s mightiest heroes, but, if he had to guess – and Clint was a guessing man – it all came down to one word and one word alone. 

_ Pity.  _

He hated to admit it to Nat, but his long-time associate had been partly right. Because, even if _Mandy_ had looked at him like she had bitten something sour, he had been thinking a lot about her – her ponytail the color of warm caramel, the way she chewed on her lower lip, or the way she would look at him, as she could see just about… everything. 

Clint wore his boxing gloves, sighing. Amanda Heart disturbed him, and he didn’t like it. It had been a long time since he had been disturbed by a woman. After Laura’s sudden death - in a car crush that was exactly what it looked like – he had found out that he didn’t have the energy to concentrate on women any longer. Women thought that a young widowersuch as himself needed to be taken care of, but he had never showed any interest, never needed any of them.

The window opened up with the strength of the fresh breeze. He inhaled the scent, pure New York with a taste of the close sea. It smelled like… change. 

Something that made him wary. Something that scared him, like nothing else before- not even facing an army of evil aliens with just a bow and arrows. 

All that Clint Barton knew was that, in the last day, he had started considering things he never thought he’d have a chance to consider ever again. 

_ Whatever it is… let’s hope I’ll be prepared. _


	2. Chapter 2

On Saturday, Amanda reached for her denim jacket and headed outside, where her older sister waited in a gleaming convertible sport car – her last boyfriend owned a car dealership and humored his girlfriend by letting her test-drive a vehicle every now and then. 

As she slid in the car, Amanda couldn’t help but notice what Ellison was wearing – a bright red sundress who caressed her curves in all the right ways. Then, she grimaces, as she looked down at her old jeans. “I think I may be a little undressed…”

Ellison simply rolled her eyes. “No worries. I’ll drive you to my boutique one of these days and liven you wardrobe up a little. Now that you’ve back to Manhattan, you can’t keep dressing up like some MIT student or an intern.” 

Amanda mastered a little smile.  “So, how’s the house? I know that there’s not a lot of furniture, but…”

“It’s enough for now, and I’ve already ordered a few pieces from a nice shop in the area. They’ll do nicely with your furniture and what I already have.” Amanda managed a little smile, picking at her cuticles. “Thank you for letting me stay.”

Ellison grimaced, and groaned something under her breath – or maybe she just hissed, and Amanda didn’t get it. She clenched her closed fists around the steering wheel, tooka big breath, as exasperated. “Mandy, you don’t have to pay me. You’re family, and that was our parents’ house.”

But Amanda shook her head, keeping her eyes low. “I need to pay my way, El.”

Ellison, knowing all too well when a battle was lost, let the subject fall, and tenderly squeezed her sister’s hand in her own. “I’m just glad you’re back for good. I’ve missed you.”

“I didn’t realize how much I was missing you until this week.”

“Then, we’ve been both lucky that they was an opening at Stark Enterprises. How’s working with Tony anyway?”

“Besides a little weird?” Amanda collapsed in the passenger chair, her head hitting the headrest as the wind ruffled her brown ponytail. “He is very… eclectic? I don’t know. I think he has… too many thoughts. He just goes from one thing to a whole other in the blink of an eye. Sometimes, it’s kind of hard following him around.”

“Speaking of which… yesterday I had brunch with Pepper, and she said that Tony told her that you’ve crossed paths with one of his super-hero friends… a certain blonde archer?”

Amanda simply blushed. “I’m not looking for a man.”

“Amanda Katherine Heart, are you telling me you didn’t find this Barton guy one of the best-looking men you’ve ever set your eyes upon?” Ellison lifted a perfectly elegant eyebrow, shining with its reddish perfection.

Amanda rolled her eyes, but the blush coloring her cheeks, and the way she averted her sister’s eyes, were telling that she too had been looking, and that she agree with Ellison’s assessment. “Okay, fine he is good looking, but you’re getting married- you shouldn’t even be looking.”

“In fact, I’m not - I’m just prescreening the field. It’s my rightful sisterly duty.” Ellison sighed. Her mind was equally divided between her impeding wedding, and her sister. Amanda was being stubborn. She just didn’t know what was good for her – and an healthy relationship with a decent man was just what the doctor would prescribe. “Seriously, sis. You should look around. You may never know when the right one would came around…”

It was Amanda’s turn to lift an eyebrow – but she guessed that effect on her was sort of lost. “Oh, of course. Like my last _one and only._ Does the name Adam ring any bell? Jerk who wanted me only because I’m family with Tony Stark?”

“Okay, fine, he was a loser. But you can’t keep running from love!” Amanda’s eyebrow was, by now, permanently arched. She had always knew that she and Ellison were different, like night and day, and was all too aware of her older sister’s guilty pleasure, the trashy romance novels you would find at newsstands for a few dollars. 

“It’s the real world, El, not some kind of _Fifty Shades of Grey fantasy_.” Amanda sighed.

“Thanks God she knows of Fifty Shades of Grey! Not everything is lost, then!”Ellison patted her sister on the arm. “I’m having a lot of extra time on my hands lately, and I’ll devote it all to you.

“Save me, Lord!” The sisters laughed, as Amanda slouched down against the leather seat, snorting in an un-lady like manner..

_***_

Ellison’s shop had a small booth at St. Nicholas flea market – and spending time with Amanda had been just an excuse. Ellison, matter of facts, _had_ to be there to help the girls out and bring along some extra inventory. 

“You sure you don’t want an hand over there?” Amanda said, stretching lazily as soon as she left the car, her sister hidden by the trunk of the car.

“No, no, go ahead. I’m just going to get something to the girls manning my booth. Stay some extra time if there’s a lot of people.I’ll give you a ring as soon as I’m finished.”

Amanda nodded, waving her hand in goodbye. She glanced around at the families headed toward the flea market, and inspired, deeply, as she left the sun kiss her skin.

She wondered if it could get any better than this – sun,a job she liked, her family close to her. What else could she ask for?

She had walked through the market for over half an hour, snooping around and buying a few things- a nice scarf, a cute pair of red leather gloves, some small trinkets for her home – when suddenly she felt goosebumps all over her skin. She swallowed, hard, and when she lifted her eyes, she saw _him_. 

Clint Barton was there- in the company of a stunning red-head- _Romanoff,_ if Amanda wasn’t mistaken – and a man, a little older than Barton himself, who looked a lot like the Avengers’ resident archer.

“Hey!” Romanoff smiled, and nodded in Amanda’s general direction as she got closer. “You’re Tony’s new assistant, right? I think we run into each other in the corridors at the tower?”

Amanda nodded, blushing, feeling the need to pull at her ponytail. “Yes- it’s Heart.Amanda Heart. Hi?” She was at loss for words. After all, what was she supposed to say to people who’ve said her life far more times than what she was probably aware of? And… they were _stunning._ Greek gods made flesh. And they remembered _her._

Barton, even a little too much. When their gazes met, she could read the words on his face. His cat-like eyes twinkled, and he didn’t even pretend to keep a straight face.

“Don’t, okay?” She pouted, blushing a little. She had, for once, forego her glasses, going for contacts instead. 

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” He lied.

“And anyway, no – I didn’t burn any more kettles.” Without the glasses covering her face, her blush was even more visible.

“You found this place on your own?” Natasha asked, trying to break the tension that had built within the small group. “Not everyone knows about St. Nicholas…”

Amanda shook her head, and cleared her voice. “Eh, no. My sister , she has a booth here. Vintage clothing, mostly.”

“Nice. I like vintage- and sometimes there are some real bargains! Maybe I’ll give a look?” But Amanda wasn’t paying attention to what Natasha was saying - as Natasha, too, had noted, her mischievous green eyes going from her best friend archer to Stark’s pet project. “You know what, Barney? I’m feeling nostalgic, and I think I saw a food truck selling Blini!”

Barney sighed, but didn’t reply. He rolled his eyes, and, hands in his jacket pockets, he allowed Natasha to drag him along, not even trying to get an introduction or have a saying in the whole affair. Amanda and Clint were, finally, left alone, and in the awkward silence Amanda did her best to try and not stare at Barton. He was different from the majority of the men she had crossed paths with in her life- he looked… larger than life, built like the athlete he was – and had to be – and yet there was no doubt he was extremely intelligent.

He met her gaze. “Yes?” He asked,smiling a bit full of himself. 

“Nothing.” Amanda’s face heated up yet again. “You’re not going to join your friends?”

“Nah, I’m watching my calories.” He patted his stomach. He had a flat abdomen, broad, muscular chest and biceps. He was wearing yet again a t-shirt in a violet shade- his signature color, according to news reports and gossip magazines – and the cotton stretched _just perfectly_ against his muscles. “And, anyway, only Nat’s my friend. Barney’s my pain-in-the-ass older brother.”

“Oh.” She said, surprised. “Then, I guess you’ll want to be with them…” Had she been him, she would have gone with her family. God only knew how much she had missed Ellison – seeing her every time she wanted to, listening to her voice in person and not just over the phone or Skype.

“Trying to get rid of me? You know, you could give me a complex…”

“I’m just… trying to be polite, I guess. I haven’t been back in town long, and I appreciate the…” she coughed. “The company.”

He smiled. “Anytime.”

“Anytime what?” Ellison interrupted as she walked into them.

“Nothing. We were just talking!” Amanda said, putting her foot in her mouth. Barton smirked, and Ellison looked at her in a “no shit Sherlock” kind of way.

“Well, ladies, I guess I’ll be off – I’m going to look for my brother and my friend.” Clint winked, and Amanda just nodded, embarrassed. 

Ellison studied them both. “Wait a sec. Was that…” Her eyes looked, almost comically, as they were saucers. Amanda, again, just nodded, blushing and biting her lips – apparently, she was doing a lot of blushing lately. “Did you invite him? Please, tell me you did!”

“No! It was just…. Chance.” Amanda’s mind went back to Clint, and she barely resisted the temptationof looking for him, following him around with her eyes. She couldn’t get him out of her head. His piercing eyes. The half-smile that seemed to hid a secret pain – which was just _ridiculous._ Clint was probably a carefree bachelor who had a long trail of women lined up for his bed and maybe even a broken heart.

Ellison’s eyes suddenly gleamed with something Amanda didn’t like – and if her grin was of any indication, problems were going to follow soon. “Oh, by the way, I forgot… Tony invited us to a party next week!”

Maybe running into the archer was just a chance encounter, but there was nothing Ellison wouldn’t have done for her sister… 


	3. Chapter 3

The “party” happened to be, actually, a charity event – one of the many sponsored by Stark Enterprises _and_ Tony himself. In the halls of what had become The Maria Stark Foundation, but had been Tony’s mother home when she was growing up, people were lined up, from the Major to the editor of the Daily Bugle, J.J. Jameson – who _hated_ Tony with a passion – to billionaire and aspiring industrialist Darius Aagger and, of course, Tony’s best friends, his “Avengers Clan”. Anyone who was someone was there and was on top of their glamorous self. 

That was why Amanda felt so much out of place among the beautiful people.Ellison, on the other hand…

Elli was wearing one of her signature red dress – halter, with a sweetheart neckline and a naked back, and had matched it with her lipstick _and_ her shoes – killer, fuck-me heels. Her younger sister, much to the clothes expert’s chagrin, had gone for an unflattering _brown_ dress and black flats, making her look more like a potato sack than a young woman in her prime. 

“It still escapes me how Tony thinks to make some money out of this. These guys here seem more interested in a free meal than helping the people of this city out…” Amanda sighed, looking around herself uncomfortable and picking at her braid. 

“There’s gonna be some kind of raffle – apparently, Pepper doesn’t like the word _auction._ She thought it was,” She air-quoted. “unethical. There are also some other sponsors – I think I’ve heard someone saying Chrysler was also involved? ”

Amanda followed Ellison to a reserved table next to the stage – her boyfriend’s gift, she said – and once they were sat, the older Heart sister showed a fistful of tickets in the lap of her younger sibling. 

“Geez, Ellie, how many tickets did you buy for this thing?”

“A few.” She giggled bubbly, almost as she was a little tipsy. She covered her lower face with a perfectly manicured hand, but to no avail. “Did I tell you what the big prize is?”

With mocked innocence, Ellison glanced at the stage, were huge posters were being set on display- black and white portraits of some of the Avengers - Barton _really_ had a good picture, with his wounded hero expression and the piercing eyes, the barely there smile. 

Amanda swallowed, hard, as her eyes fell on the tickets in her lap. “They are not auctioning the posters off, right?”

“Auction? No, no… Tony said Pepper didn’t like the idea of an auction. Especially given that her soon-to-be husband would have been one of the prizes. Nope- it’s an old-fashioned ruffle. They get your ticket, you get a date. And,” She lifted an eyebrow, conspicuous. “It’s for a good cause, too. Think of all the people the Maria Stark Foundation helps!” 

Amanda opened her mouth up as to say something, but then she decided not to. How could she say, after all? Ellison was right. Although the hoots and whistles didn’t seem to indicate a dedication to the cause- more to most of the men and women being showed off on stage. 

“Is it just me, or Banner seems a little down?”She asked, bowing her head a little to the side. 

“Nope, you are not wrong. Poor Bruce didn’t have a lot of requests – apparently, Nat and I are the only ones interested in spending time with him.” Amanda felt a gentle hand squeezing her shoulder affectionately. She turned, and standing at her back there was a smiling Pepper. She was wearing a beautiful sleeveless ivory dress, that did nothing but make her skin look much more ethereal. A stab of envy – or maybe a little bit of shame – hit Amanda right in the gut. She was in the company of two beautiful women, with class and style in spades, and here she was, the ugly duckling never meant to turn into a swan. “Oh, by the way, I was forgetting. Here, I got a few tickets for you.”

Another stash of tickets was offered to the brunette, who blushed. “Who are all these tickets for?”

“Clint.” Both women answered at the same time. Amanda studied the paper in her lap, in her hands. There were a lot of tickets – so many that she wasn’t sure she could actually count them. Definitely not “the few” Pepper had been talking about.

“There’s nothing we wouldn’t do for our intrepid heroes and this city- besides, Tony would have been annoyed if I didn’t help raise some money.”

Numbers were gingerly picked by J.J. Jameson himself from a top hat on the stage. An elegant, elderly woman won Steve, a young woman who had made money with a revolutionary app got the King of Wakanda, and so on, and then, it was Barton’s turn.

Nobody went to the stage to claim the poster and an envelope with a ticket. From the stage, Barton looked around, a little confused, while Jameson was starting to get impatient.

Amanda shivered, then looked at the all too satisfied Ellison and Pepper. “I think, sis, that they just called your name.”

“Amanda Heart? Ticket number 0127? Is she here or not?!” Jameson grunted. He sounded, and looked, far older than his years when he acted like that.“Well?”

“C’mon, Mandy, you don’t want to embarrass us in front of all these people and Tony, right?” Ellison batted her lashes in fake innocence.

Amanda stood, taking a big breath. She stiffly reached the stage, where an extremely annoyed and bothered Jameson gave her the poster and the envelope while she attempted a smile. Once done, she walked past the evil Pepper & Ellison,without sparing a single glance at them, and kept walking until she reached the bar, the ticket in her hand and the poster under her arm. As she ordered a pinky Paloma[1] drink,the poster fell on the ground, but someone was quickly there to give it back to her.

_ Of course  _ it had to be him. 

“So, we have a date, uh?” He said with a cheerful voice- too cheerful for her own liking as he grabbed a beer from aa bucket filled with ice. “Glad that it’s not one of the ladies from some retirement home- it happened once, and they are just _awful._ So handsy.”

Amanda dared to look at him. He was smiling with his eyes. 

She was _a goner_ for those kind of smiles. 

“By the way, I saw all your tickets – am I supposed to be flattered or scared?” He asked. 

Amanda _laughed._ It was the kind of laugh that filled people’s hearts. It was real and honest and her pose exposed the marble column of her neck.

“My sister and Pepper bought them for me. I didn’t know there was going to be a raffle.”

“You don’t seem very happy. Should I feel insulted?” Barton narrowed his bright eyes. “You are not planning on standing me up, right? Because it would look bad – worse than Bruce, who had only Pepper and Nat buying tickets.”

Amanda drank her cocktail, and smiled. “Oh, rest assured I’m not planning to- money went for a good cause, after all. I see this as a civic duty.”

Smiling, she made her way outside, but, once at the door, she stopped, and turned. Barton’s eyes were following her around. 

And he was smiling.

The breath died in her chest, and, with her heart beating so loud she thought people around her could hear it, Amada made her way outside, hoping that the chilly night would cool her heated skin. But it didn’t work.

His smile and his eyes followed her back home, and into her dreams.

  


* * *

[1] A refreshing drink made with tequila, grapefruit and club soda. 


	4. Chapter 4

“Ellie, _please_. You know I don’t do dresses – I mean, you saw me the other night. I was just awful.” Amanda looked around her sister’s vintage boutique and whimpered, but her sister just grunted something in annoyance. Somehow, though, when it came from Ellison’s lips, even the most un-lady like sound seemed… fashionable.

“Of course you did look awful, Mandy. I told you to let me come shopping with you, but no, you had to buy a… Chinese dress over _the internet_. If you’d come here, the result would have been different.” Ellison shook her head, her soft, free hair dancing in the rose-scented air of her shop. She was biting her lips, concentrated, looking everywhere for pieces that would fulfill their purpose, and that would satisfy every party involved. “Now let me be the shopping genius that I am and let’s find some nice outfits for your date with love.”

“Ellison,” Amanda hissed, using her sister’s full name. “I’m not looking for a man!”

Ellison _snickered._ “Sure. And I didn’t see how you two were looking at each other. You had that virginal blush that means that you were imagining him either naked or doing sinful things while _you_ were naked.”

“Ellison!” Amanda screamed at low voice. She looked around, as checking out that people hadn’t listened to what her sister had been saying, which made her sister laugh. 

“C’mon, your wardrobe is just _awful._ You don’t need just dresses, but nicer clothes too. Not just for dating, but, you know, to impress people. In general. Besides, I can’t have people knowing that I’m related to you when you dress _like that._ ” Ellison lazily indicated Amanda’s daily outfit – old jeans, a faded t-shirt and sneaker, a far cry from what _she_ was wearing – a denim sleeveless little dress with a belt, suede pumps and a sporty bomber .

Rolling her eyes, Amanda checked her utilitarian watch – one of those technological monstrosity in black plastic that could tell you how much it was raining in Singapore or Helsinki at any given time. “Ellison, I’m on my lunch break. My boss is not gonna be happy if I’m late.”

The use of her full name didn’t escape the older Heart sister. “Your boss is Tony. Trust me, he isn’t going to be mad just because you are trying to dress up for his friend. All right – time to get started!”

Amanda just sighed, knowing when she was defeated, already sick and tired of having to tell people that she wasn’t looking for a man, nor for a one night stand. “Fine, okay. Let’s get it done with. What did you have in mind?”

Ellison stood one good minute in silence, thinking very carefully about she should have said. What she wanted, she thought, was seeing her sister at the side of a decent and nice man. From what Tony had shared with her, Clint Barton would have been perfect, and it seemed like he shared quite the chemistry with the younger Heart. 

But Ellison wasn’t a dumb idiot like people thought. She knew when she was supposed to open her pretty mouth and when it was better to stay in silence. 

So, she went for diplomacy instead. 

“I just want those clothes to go, because you’re the smartest people I know, but you have such a low bar for your personal life thatit makes me sad.” Amanda shivered, and swallowed a knot in her throat. She was right – she knew that Ellison was right. Fact was, sometimes Amanda thought she had just existed, merely gone through the motions, doing what was expected of her – what her parents would have wanted. 

She took a big breath and closed her eyes, as to ready herself for a fight she knew she had no chance winning. “Fine. Let’s do this.”

. “That’s the attitude! Go into dressing room number one and I’ll bring you something to try on!” Ellison gleamed, as she was a gem shining of her own light. Squealing exited, she started going through all the single pieces of clothing presented in her cute shop. “It’s gonna be _awesome._ Once you’ll be transfigured into your true self, I’ll be recognized as a missionary for the fashion-less!”

Amanda had barely entered the huge dressing room that Ellison was already there, her arms filled with what looked, at the untrained eye, like _thousands_ of clothes. For the next half an hour, Amanda tried on clothes for size, and went discharging the majority of them even without seeing how they would look on her first – too revealing, just not her style, colors too bright…

Over half an hour, and all she got for the effort was a blouse (light pink) and green-colored jeans. 

Ellison sighed, not even bothering to say a sole word. Her look was indication enough of what exactly she thought of her sister’s choices- and that she didn’t think Amanda was grateful enough for all of her help. “All right. Anyway. Try this out.”

“Is that… a dress?” Amanda sighed at the vision right before her – it was a pencil dress, sleeveless, bright red and with a black band on one side. It was simple, and yet… it screamed something. It screamed: _Look at my owner!_ “I don’t know, El. I mean, you saw me at the party. I’m just not sure if me and dresses are a done deal after all…”

“Nonsense. You just weren’t’ looking for something that would look good on you – that’s exactly why I told you not to buy a Chinese dress over the internet. Not only this dress is prefect for you, but it will also be _your dress_ for your _fabulous_ dinner date with that _fabulous_ super-hero who’s sweet on you – also, I got it from _Italy_ of all places, artisan, mind you – no other girl in the city will ever have it. Double the envy, double the pleasure, right?”

“I’m not sure anything of what you said makes any sense…” Amanda smiled, easing into the dress. “Can I breath in this?”

“Breathing is so last year!” Ellison joked, entering the changing room and looking at her sister. “Oh, yes. That’s the one. Now we just need accessories, and get you an appointment to Xavier’s – he is the most wanted beautician in the city. Hair, make-up, face-mask, nails, wax, you name it, he has it. ”

And, considering how Amanda used to look, she was going to need it all, Ellison mused. _Especially the full-body wax._

Yep. She really hoped that Amanda would need the wax. _Like, everywhere_.

Ellison was so lost in her own little world and in trying to bring back to her mind Xavier’s number, that she didn’t even listen to her little sister trying to call and try to stop her with claims that _There’s nothing wrong with my hair – the last thing I need is a new haircut!_

Shrugging defeated, Amanda lazily wondered through the shop, looking at the multitude of colorful blouses from the seventies and eighties, pretty dresses that wouldn’t have been out of place in Woodstock during the well renowned concert in 1969, even some twenties dress that seemed straight out of Baz Luhrmann’s _The Great Gatsby._

Amanda suddenly caught a glimpse of her reflection, and was speechless; she checked twice, making sure it was really her in the mirror. Her sister was right: that dress _was_ her, and it changed her- for the better, if the whistle she caught was of any indication.

She turned, and met Clint Barton’s eyes. He was leaning against a wall, smirking, hands in the pockets of his pants. 

She blushed, trying to cover herself, almost as the neckline of her dress was too low, too revealing, despite being anything but. “What are you doing here?!”she demanded. 

He indicated a point at his back with his thumb, and Amanda saw Pepper, busy talking with Ellison and going through evening and cocktail dresses. “Pepper asked me if I could drive her.”

_ Of course, and by pure coincidence, she had to check on those dresses when _ I _happened to be here,_ Amanda thought. Apparently, it wasn’t just Tony and Ellison rooting for her and the avenging archer diving into the hot and troubled waters of a relationship;Pepper was on their case, too. 

“Closeyour mouth, Barton, or you’ll catch a fly – and stop staring at me.” She was flustered, but her voice was at least an octave higher.

He grinned, his smile curled into a sly smile. “But why should I stop looking at you, when you look so nice and attractive in that cute dress of yours?”

Amanda simply groaned. “Sure. Listen, Mister Barton…”

“Clint,” he corrected her, with his charming smile, his eyes deep and low, while leaning so close to her their head were almost bumping into each other. 

“Yes- okay, listen, _Clint,_ You are a very handsome man, and I’m sure you’re sued to women drooling over you, but…” 

“Did you just call me handsome?!”

“I didn’t call you handsome, Barton- I’m merely stating a fact. You may not have noticed the hordes of women calling your name at rails and the likes, but trust me- you probably have as many fans as Captain America.” 

She entered in the changing room, and heard Clint wait for her outside. She could feel his very presence, although he was keeping in silence. “How come we always get off on the wrong foot?” he asked, his voice so low it was almost like an afterthought. It took her only a moment to change back into her clothes, and pull her old, raggedy sneakers on – almost as she was scared that Ellison would be back with new clothes, or, worse… that he would barge in and ravage her with ardent kisses and hot touches.

“So, like I said, I drove Pepper here. Then I saw you in the shop. And I thought that maybe we could exchange numbers?” He said, scratching the back of his neck and giving her his phone.

“I think I’d know if you were running late because the world needs saving…” She lifted an eyebrow, but typed her number in anyway.

“Didn’t know you were here doing…” he pinpointed with his hand the dress on her arm. “These. You know. Shopping.”

Amanda blushed, and smiled slightly. She tucked a rebellious stray of hair behind her hear, and lowered her head a little. “I wasn’t… My sister. She owns the place. She is trying to work some of her magic on me – or at least, that’s what she says. If you ask me, she needs someone to look after. Or maybe I’m some kind of pet-project of hers. Still not sure yet.

As on cue, Ellison joined them, her arms full with clothes from vintage designers for one of her favorite clients – and the richest one, on top of that, too – followed by the _favorite client_ in person.

“Well, well, well… Mister… Barton, is it?” Ellison _purred,_ giving a look at her sister that seemed to say that she _had_ to do something about this man, or else… “Is there anything I can help you with? Need anything for a nice lady? I didn’t even ask- are you married? Engaged? Single?”

“Nah, I’m fine.” He took his cell back, and then headed towards the exit. “Pep, I’ll wait in the car. Wonna catch the last baseball game on the radio” He screamed at top of his voice.

“Cute. What was that all about, again?” Ellison asked, looking at Mr. Barton’s delectable derriere. Pepper laughed, and elbowed her friend/surrogate family-to-be in the side, making Ellison jump a little. 

“He needed my number. For that dinner we have scheduled.” She said it with total nonchalance, and yet, she was blushing, as she was a shy little girl enamored with the star quarterback, ready to go to the ball with him after years of dreams. 

Ellison sighed, exasperated, barely believing how her sister still acted like she didn’t care, like nothing could move her at all. “Listen, I’ve got you an appointment at eleven. The day of you dinner date, no less- your hair will be impeccable this way. Wonna have lunch with me afterwards?”

Amanda closed her eyes, and pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing out loud. “El, I’ve got a job. I can’t just leave everything behind because you think I need a new haircut…”

“Sure you can. That’s why I hired a whole team of people.” Pepper shrugged. “It’s called _delegate_. You should try it sometimes- it’s really thrilling.”

“Of course you did..” Amanda mumbled loud enough to be heard, low enough to deny any possible accusation. “Fine, whatever. But I have to run now. I haven’t scheduled any delegating for this afternoon, so…”

“Fine, fine, whatever…” Ellisonwaved her hands in the air, as to send her sister on her merry way, as staying together- and trying clothes on – seemed so tiresome. “But I’m gonna drop by this evening. We need to hem the dress and look at accessories and make-up.”

“Sure. Whatever.” She hurried away, and walked down the busy street. Even if she hadn’t been back for long, even if it had been years since she had last walked those pavements, she still knew everything by heart. She had missed this – her home, her _city,_ her family.

And she hadn’t been able to say it – to accept it –until she had returned.

“Amanda?” She stopped in her track, and, swallowing, she slowly turned. There, standing tall on the concrete, there was Clint Barton. She made the mistake of staring into his eyes, and fear froze her. 

He was… so much bigger than life. And charming. And beautiful. 

Was there really any chance she could resist him- that she wouldn’t fall for him in an heartbeat?

She shook her head, and strode towards the metro. 

“Amanda, wait!” he called after her, but his voice did nothing but spur her furthermore; she turned a corner, and, sighing, realized what she was doing- and how silly she must have looked to the outsiders looking in- people who didn’t know why she needed running from such a charming man – man who could easily break her frail glassy heart.

“Okay, what the hell just happened?” He demandedwhen he reached her. Her eye were wide and staring at him, and locks of hair had escaped her ponytail, making her look much more real and approachable. 

She didn’t answer – she just bit her lips and shook her head, her eyes darting to the void emptiness. 

“You know what? Maybe we should start over.” He offered her his hand to shake. “Hi, I’m Clinton Francis Barton, former spy, full-time Avenger. And I also own and manage a building.”

Amanda lifted her head and met Clint’s merry eyes. She blushed as she put her small hand in his bigger one. “And, you are…”

“Amanda Heart, former assistant professor of biotechnology engineering and currently Tony’s personal slave and captive of each and every of his whims.”

“Did he call you in the middle of the night?” Clint asked, smirking and lifting a perfect dark blonde eyebrow. “I think if I had a professor like you, I’d never have dropped out of school..”

“I actually taught at UCLA…” she said, but then she saw his grin. “Oh, you were kidding. Of course.”

“I am. But, I have complete faith that you’ll tell me everything about what you sued to do and what the hell a biotechnologist is on our date.”

“I… don’t think it’s really a date.” Even if she was going to dress up and wear make-up. And maybe heels. 

“Right. So…”

“I _really_ have to go.” She said, eyeing the metro from afar. She nodded politely, smiling in a tight line, and started to walk straight towards the closest station. 

“Wait! Let me buy you a cup of coffee!”

She turned, walking backwards, smiling. “Can’t do. I’m way too busy this afternoon. Tony’s coming over to see what progresses Cho and I are making!”

“Does it mean you’re going to stay?” He asked, practically screaming so that his voice could be heard over the cacophony that was everyday life in New York City.

“We’ll see if I’ll find a good reason to!” He didn’t know why, but her words did something to him. Suddenly, Clint felt like he didn’t have any ground underneath his feet – like she could be the only thing anchoring him to life and a normal existence, the only thing that could keep _Clint_ alive behind the facade that was Hawkeye.

He run – just like he used to when in action, when his action would save his life and those of countless others – and he reached her. When he did, he was breathless, and his conscience suggested it had nothing to do with running- and everything with the woman walking at his side. “Amanda… are we okay? I… I know it’s silly, but… I always feel like I did something wrong and…”

She shook her head. “No. It’s me. I promise you- it has nothing to do with you.” _You are too perfect for that…._

He scratched his head. “I guess I’ll see you this weekend, then?” 

“Yep. Saturday evening.”He nodded. “I’ll see you, Clint.”

As he looked at her form, he stuck his hands in his pockets. He sighed, and made his way towards the car, hoping that Pepper wasn’t there yet. He needed time to himself, and he didn’t want to her any of her questions. 

He didn’t know what was wrong with him. He didn’t get the mystery that was Amanda Heart. He just knew that all his good intentions and his instincts flew out of the window the minute they crossed paths, and the more she resisted, the more he wanted to get closer and closer to her.

He walked past a florist, but stopped when a sign caught his attention: _don’t forget to get your date some flowers!_

It _was_ a date. Even if she didn’t want to admit it, it was a real date. She had been choosing _a dress._ And he had seen how she looked at him. She practically had starts in her eyes. She _wanted_ for their dinner to be a date just as much as he did, but something was holding the cute professor back.

Smiling, he opened the glassy door of the flower shop, and a cloud of soft and delicate scent hugged him instantly, lulling his senses – it was so much better that the artificial scent diffusors he had at home and that always made him nauseous and gave him awful headaches. 

Maybe it was too soon to buy Amanda flowers – but it wasn’t soon enough to _reserve_ them. 

Saturday wouldn’thave arrived soon enough, for his tastes.


	5. Chapter 5

“So, Lucky, I was thinking, she may be hiding something. Or do you think it’s just me?” Lucky, the half-blind dog Clint had rescued years prior, didn’t answer. He didn’t even acknowledge Clint’s question at all – he was far into the bowl of food he had been kindly given by his owner. 

_ Human  _ food- his favorite. 

Rain tapped against the windows as Clint kept stirring his food. Over the last few days, he had had another couple of close encounters with the cute former teacher, and she kept being… shy? No, he corrected himself. She wasn’t shy – she stood tall and proud, a r cry from a shy creature. But she was secretive, and there was an odd aura whenever they were together in the same room. It seemed like whatever he said or did, it was wrong and it irritated her. 

He turned off the flame, and took a glass and a plate from the kitchen isle. His eyes fell on Lucky, pretending he didn’t see his owner at all. It was almost – almost – like eating completely alone. Which, he told himself pushing away Amanda’s smile from his memory, was exactly what he wanted. He was _fine_ with that. Besides, once a month he had poker with Tasha and the rest of the gang, and if it wasn’t for that, there were also the sporadic and unannounced visits of…

Someone knocked at the door, stopping Clint’s musing. Sighing, he went to open, already knowing who was there. _Speak of the devil,_ he thought to himself. He didn’t know if being irritated or amused- Barney had always had that effect on him. He was the big brother, and yet, it was Clint who did all the brotherly stuff older brothers were supposed to. _Like keeping said brother on the straight and narrow and out of jail._

“Barney. Did you smell food all the way from your apartment?” Strangely enough, even if they were neighbors, Barney never seemed to be around – not when Clint needed him, at least. But Clint was always expected to be home, ready to pick Barney’s pieces up, and solve his problems. 

“Oh, you are cooking?” Everything in Barney’s tone suggested that he had been well aware of this fact. “Lucky, you sly dog! How are we doing today, uh?” The traitorous creature, forgetting who had taken actual bullets for him (Clint) and who feed and take care of him (also Clint) launched himself at Barney. Behaving like he hadn’t seen the former FBI agent turned criminal in months, he went and threw himselfat the older Barton brother.

Clint, the blonde Barton, lifted an eyebrow. 

“Fine, I knew you were cooking and I love your Brazilian cooking. But that’s not what I’m here for.”

Clint sighed, suddenly seemed sick and tired of saying the same thing over and over again. “Barney, I can’t give you any money. You owe me too much already, and it’s not like super-heroes make a ton of dollars.”

“I don’t want your money, you idiot.” Barney mumbled. “I just wanted to…” Barney sighed. He went to sit at Clint’s table, and despite the plate of warm food right before him, he didn’t eat. He just crossed his arms on the table, and looked as in the void, as he was looking for the right words, for a good way to say what was running through his head in that moment. “Clint, it’s been _Years._ Don’t you think you should maybe…”

Clint sighed. Someone else giving him the speech. Trying to get him to date again. To get him out of his shell. If not today, tomorrow Barney would have reminded him how he had never gotten a nephew or a niece, and how the Barton name was going to die with them.

“I don’t know. Maybe you should at least start dating again? You’ll never meet a nice girl if you don’t start going out. And I want you to be as happy as I am.”

“Wait.. what? You are dating?! Since when?”

Pink tinged Barney’s cheeks as he scratched his head. “Yeah. Well, it’s… kind of serious. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to jinx things, but things are pretty serious. I’ve never really known what I wanted till now, Clint, but this, it’s… it’s right, you know? I want to build something with her, and… she is the one. I want to spend the rest of my life with this woman.”

“Are you talking about… marriage?” Barney reddened, and nodded. “And who is this mystery woman?” 

“You’ll know soon enough.” His eyes fell on his watch, and he swallowed hard, as he was panicking. “Heck. I’m running late and she’s waiting for me. So, you sure you are all right?”

“I am- Clint said, smiling. – You sure you don’t want to tell me who the hell she is?”

“I’ll tell you when she’ll says yes, and no jokes about women being unable to turn down a Barton man, I’ve heard them all!”

Clint looked at his brother running away, ready to meet his leading lady and hoping to escape the doghouse in case of tardiness. He shook his head and patted Lucky on the head. He was happy for his brother, but he wasn’t sure if Barney was a marriage kind of guy. Marriage… it was an hard topic for him. And if he was sad, it was only because he was being nostalgic.It was normal. Very Human.

Amanda Heart’s eyes and her smile suddenly filled his mind, and he did his best to send the thought away. “Me and Amanda? Yeah, sure… and maybe that jerk of his brother is dating Simone, our nice and sweet neighbor…”

_ *** _

Amanda was in her lab/office trying to heat a coffee up in the microwave without setting anything on fire when she heard someone knocking at her door; she didn’t even had time to answer that a mass of perfect red hair on an even more perfect body invaded her personal space. “Hi. I bought you a plant.”

Amanda took the offering and placed it on her table, looking at a smiling Natasha getting comfortable; there was something in the Russian’s eyes- as she saw something – knew some secret – and couldn’t wait to see when the rest of the world would catch up with her. “I’ve been told you’ve got a very Spartan apartment and that you don’t even have a couch. I thought it could use some life. Also, I move a lot, and I’ve got a lot of furniture in storage. In case you are interested…”

“Oh, it’s awfully nice of you, but I’m not sure I’ll be staying. Or, for how long.”

“Oh, something tells me you’ll be staying.” She said, sure. “I just have a feeling- last time I did, it was with Scott and Hope, and now they are married.”

Amanda swallowed an answer up, and took another cup for her guest. 

“So, I also wanted to ask you, what do you think of Clint?”

“Clint?” She asked. She swallowed, and blushed. “I… guess he is nice.”

“Sweetie, a spring day in Central Park is nice. Clint? He is a good man. Far from perfect, mind you, but definitely a decent man. He’s got some baggage, and I think he’s been alone for far too long, which I’d like to change. Like, right now. I want you to give him a chance.”

“Come again?!” Amanda asked with eyes wide open.

“Clint is single, you are single, you both love the city, you both spend all your time here where there’s a lack of available singles. Bearing this in mind, will you give him a chance?”

“You know that our thing… it’s not like a real date, right?”

“I, know, still, I wouldn’t mind if you were to give Clint a chance.” Natasha sipped her coffee, elegantly. She was a Romanoff, shared the same surname as the former and now deceased royal family, and for a second, Amanda wondered if all the stories about little Anastasia surviving the massacre were true, and if maybe, just maybe, Natasha wasn’t some kind of great-great-granddaughter of the woman. “Also, how are you with poker? My friends and I, we play couple of times a month – once only us girls, and sometimes we invite the guy and we let them believe we are sore losers at cards. If you want to meet new people, I’d be the perfect opportunity.”

“Oh, I don’t know. I mean, I always have so many things to do and…”

But Natasha shook her head. “Sweetie, in case you were wondering… I wasn’t asking. You are joining us, and that’s final.”

Amanda sighed heavily, so much so that Natasha just couldn’t _not_ hear her. But, behind her cup, she was grinning – and even if the Soviet Spy couldn’t see her mouth, she had a good view of Amanda’s eyes. 

And they were gleaming . As if she was smiling with her whole being.

_ *** _

Amanda guessed that the old saying about a watched pot never boiling could have as easily been invented for coffee, if her espresso machine was of any indication. It was the only luxury she had allowed herself, way too much dependent on caffeine. 

Especially in the early mornings. 

Especially after a tumultuous nigh spent dreaming of eyes she had no business dreaming about. At all. 

Her doorbell rang, and she stole a glance at a nearby clock. It wasn’t even 7 AM – who the hell went and rang doorbells at such an unholy hour? She paced, barefoot, to the front door, and caught a glimpse of none other than Clint Barton himself from the peephole.

She wondered what reason he could have to be there, and, sighing, realized it had to be nothing. The doorbell rang again, and Amanda decided that, despite being dressed with a pair of lilac yoga pants – the kind that came with flared legs – and a pale green thank top, she was presentable.

Kind of.

Well, presentable enough to open the door and make sure that he would stop ringing her doorbell. At 7 AM.

“Everything okay?” She asked, lifting an eyebrow. He was wearing jeans, sneakers and a white shirt, the sleeves rolled up. It was open, allowing the violet t-shirt underneath to be seen. 

“Yeah.” He cleared his voice a little. “Just delivering the armchair. Tasha asked me if I could delivery it early.”

Amanda closed her eyes and took a big breath. Then another. Then, for good measure, she took some more.

She had _never_ asked Natasha for her old armchair. Matter of fact, she had been adamant he didn’t need it. But, she guessed, the redhead seemed to have an ulterior motive: getting her to spend as much time as possible in Barton’s company. 

“Well, thank you for bringing it by.”

“Eh, you’re welcome. And, anyway… is that coffee that I’m smelling?”

“Sure. You want some?” She dead-paned, as she said just because he had sort of demanded it.

Clint lifted an eyebrow. “You know, I think you can do better than that.”

“Sorry.” She blushed, and fixed a runaways lock of hair behind her ear. “May I offer you a freshly brewed coffee, Mister Barton?” 

“You know, I never thought you’d ask.”

“Come on in, then.” She opened the door wide, and showed him inside. Barton turned and looked at the cute armchair – Amanda swore she had seen it on an Ikea catalogue – and scratched the side of her neck. “Right. The chair. You need an hand?”

“Nah, it’s not that heavy.” And, as to prove her this simple fact, he lifted the chair – maybe not as it was nothing, but with definitely less effort than an ordinary man- and placed it in the living room, right before a coffee table and the TV, where only a picnic chair stood. “Wow. Nat wasn’t lying. You really have less than the necessary.”

Amanda blushed, and gestured to the small kitchen, with its mismatched chairs around a small table that had nothing to do with the environment and was filled with mechanical instruments. Old newspapers covered the wooden surface, protecting it from the obvious stains. “Is that… a carburetor?”

Amanda nodded. “My neighbor was having issues with the car. I told her I’d see what I could do.”

“You know,” he said, sitting at the table and waiting for his coffee. “Women usually sew. Knit. Cook.” He saw her grimace, and something that looked awfully close to shame. He bits his tongue and sighed. “It wasn’t an insult, Amanda. Being different is good. I mean, look at me – I was a _carnie,_ for God’s sake. And now? I’m an Avenger.”

Amanda didn’t say anything, although she had on the back a reply about being different non always being good. She gave him his coffee, and Clint sipped it at closed eyes, as he was mesmerized. “That’s a real good coffee you’ve got here.”

She chuckled. “Well, apparently there’s something I’m good at in the kitchen.” 

Clint grinned, but then he stared, open mouthed, at her. She was playing with her left ring finger, as there was a phantom ring there, lost in her own thoughts. “Did you… lose a ring?” He asked, as his eyes fell on his ring-finger as well. It was empty, as it had been for the last couple of years.

“I was engaged – had to get married next week, actually. But I realized I was in love with the idea of being in love – and he was in love with the chance of getting into Tony’s entourage.”

“I’m Sorry,” he just said. And yet, he truly wasn’t, he realized, scared like he hadn’t been in a long time.

Amanda Heart could really do some heavy damage to his broken soul, if he didn’t pay enough attention. 


	6. Chapter 6

A bell chimed as Amanda opened the door to Xavier’s hair saloon, and instantly, all eyes were on the scientist. The commotion in the busy shop stopped, and Amanda swallowed, as she looked around for her sister, freezing on the spot. The saloon was elegant and modern, not too cold, somehow welcoming, and the air was filled with the scent of flowers. Perfect creatures, beautiful women who seemed worth of a photo shot were everywhere, and Amanda never felt out of place like in that moment. 

She was already taking a step back, one hand on the doorknob, when a tall man, bald with a blonde goatee, with a black high-neck sweater, came towards her, his fingers joined like in a prayer at his chin’s height. “Amanda Heart? Hello, dear -I’m Carlos Xavier.”

Amanda just nodded, then lowered her eyes. Social situations, she wasn’t good at. “I was… I’m supposed to meet my sister. Ellison Heart, I mean. But, I don’t see her, so maybe I should reschedule?”

“Nonsense, my dear. Besides, we’re booked solid for the next few weeks, and I’ve been told this has to happen today.” Xavier, grinning, took her arm, and patter her shoulder, as to reassure the young woman at his side, and walked her to a white leather chair. She sat, and, mumbling to himself, Xavier started to examine her, lock for lock. 

“Well, I’m not going to lie- this is bad. But, not the worse I’ve seen. Besides, I’ve been told I’m a miracle worker.” 

For the next couple of hours, Amanda was passed from worker to worker, from seat to seat, until she was back in Xavier’s hands, her hair lighter and soft, with the man holding a golden pair of scissors in his expert hands. 

“So…” He whispered in her ear,leaning closer to her. “Ellison told me you’ve won a date with an Avenger. And that there’s this a _mazing_ chemistry between you two…”

Amanda focused her eyes on her sneakers. “I… I just knew him for a few days.”

The scissor began their work, and Carlos moved around Amanda, his eyes narrow, his brow knit. “I’ve been told he is widowed. Natasha, bless her soul, she tells me he is a tormented soul.”

Amanda gasped as the blow drier was turned on. Clint was widowed? Oh, and she had been so… so tactless! The pain she thought was there, it hadn’t been just her imagination. Clint had loved and suffered one of the greatest loss possible, and she had assumed- even said to himself – that he was just a… just a ruthless playboy, jumping from bed to bed. 

She was still musing, thinking how asking for his forgiveness, when Carlos sighed, content, and patted her on the shoulders from behind. “So, tell me, what do you think? In all honesty.”

Amanda examined herself in the mirror, from all angels, and came to just one conclusion: Carlos was a genius. The new hair suited her, with the soft, dancing strands bouncing on her shoulders, bangs framing her face.

“Do you think I could get it done by myself?” She asked, dreading the answer, but Carlos just nodded, andshowed her all she would have needed to copy the style herself – many products, a new hairdryer, a ceramic brush and a few other amenities. Amanda was opening her wallet, ready to pay, makingso a huge dent in her bank account, when Xavier shook his head. 
    
    
      No, no.” He covered her tiny hand with his bigger one, kind like only an older, wiser man could be. “No need to, _querida._ Ellison’s helped me a lot when everybody would turn their back on _pobre viejo yo_. Besides, look at you: my masterpiece _and_ a living advertising! And _gratis!”_
    
    
    
       Amanda blushed. Lowering her eyes, she couldn’t help but play with her new hairdo, bouncing the soft strands in the palm of her hand. “You may be right about the whole masterpiece thing, Mister Xavier. You really are an artist...”
    
    
    
      “Don’t be so hard on yourself, querida. You had the basic resources. To start with!”
    
    
    
      “Now I know you are lying.” Amanda couldn’t help but giggle. It felt so strange: sometimes, it felt like she hadn’t laughed- not honestly, at least- for the longest time.
    
    
    
      “Oh my, your sister is right. You do have what it takes to steal the heart of a super-hero!”
    
    
    
      “Of course I do!” Suddenly, Amanda’s back was crushed against her sister’s back; Ellison kept her little sister close, holding her for a shoulder. “Even if the hearts of hundreds and hundreds of women will be crushed! But, ehy, she is my little sister: how could I want anything different from a super-hero for her?”
    
    
    
      Amanda stood speechless, at open-mouth, as she was trying to find aa way to get back at Ellison- remember her once again that no, there was absolutely nothing going on between her and the archer, no matter what people kept saying. She was really ready to return – maybe with something a little nasty, in the spirit of sisterhood – but she was stopped before she could do any lasting damage by Xavier’s laughter. 
    
    
    
      “Here, querida, take this.” He offered her a coupon. “A fifty percent discount on your first manicure here. I think you’ll need it.”
    
    
    
      Amanda’s eyes fell on her hands. They weren’t exactly ugly, but they weren’t nice either. They were... well, her skin was rough,her cuticles needed some extra work and, well, she was ashamed to admit it, but she had to keep her nails extra low not only because they were kind of an hazard in the labs or when she fixed something at home, but because sometimes, just sometimes, she was still so nervous she barely resisted biting on them.
    
    
    
      “Lin’s free, Carlos? I think we may need some extra work done like, right now. She has an hot date this evening, you know...” Ellison winked as her eyes fell on Amanda’s sorry excuse of a manicure. “I mean, she’ll need some fake nails. Sturdy fake nails. One never knows when one will need to scratch one man’s back in the throes of passion...”
    
    
    
      Amanda blushed, but joined her sister in her laughter, so honest and happy and beautiful, as it came straight from their hearts. She had missed this – missed her family, her home, and she hadn’t understood it fully until now. She had never had any real need to run: here, she could be happy, she could be among friends and family and just be the best version of herself… and maybe, just maybe… she could fall in love again, this time for real, this time with someone worth it. 
    
    
    
      “Here, here, girls, come with me. I’ll get Lin and May to take care of you. And, we’ll need something to keep you occupied, yes?I say, you need to push away all those awful thoughts from your head, _querida_ , just relax and think about silly girly things. Say, how long has it been since last time you went through a gossip magazine?” 
    
    
    
      Ellison chuckled, her elbow resting on her little sister’s shoulder. “Like, never?”
    
    
    
      Carlos shook his head, and took both women arm in arm, and, standing proud as he was a King in his reign, he guided the sisters in the area of his saloon reserved for nails treatments, where a busty redhead and a stern-looking Asian women were saying fond farewells to a satisfied costumer – a woman who, from the look of things, had a lot of money and not a lot of style.
    
    
    
      “Girls? I’m leaving the Heart sisters in your hands. You already know Ellison dear, but this piece of art is her baby sister, Amanda. You’ll have to work very hard on this one – and be quick, she has a date this evening!”
    
    
    
      May saluted, cheerful, and kissed Ellison fondly on the cheek, as they were old friends; Lin was a whole other affair. She stood in her place, arms crossed, and studied Amanda, and when she got closer, without asking for permission or any preambles, she just grabbed the woman’s face and studied the make-up she had been applied minutes before. 
    
    
    
      “Uh. Natural tones, bold eyes… what color is her dress?” She demanded Ellison, making Amanda gasp. It was like she wasn’t even there, just a doll and not a real person, or a kid, someone who couldn’t take a decision of her own when it came to style. 
    
    
    
      “Dress is gonna be red with a black detail,” She started to play with her phone and showed the woman a picture, showcasing the model she had personally selected for her younger sister. “Lips will be the same hue of red. So, I was thinking, going bold with the nails? Black, maybe?”
    
    
    
      Lin shook her head, looking at Ellison, still pretending the person in question wasn’t there at all. “No, she isn’t ready for black, she is not the type. Besides, loud colors are a deterrent for men, don’t you know? First date? You have to go with pink –I’ve got this new color, called Hawaiian Sunrise – it’s shiny, it’s pink and it’s not too bold.”
    
    
    
      “You are always so right, Lin” Ellison nodded, her eyes semi-closed, like she was in the presence of a deity. “Oh! I saw this new color you got? Black to reality? This very dark red?”
    
    
    
      “Of course - there’s little you can’t afford, after all. Besides, you already got your man. No need to be shy!”
    
    
    
      “But, I kind of like black…” Amanda pouted as she was walked towards two comfy and posh-looking armchairs. She sat down, and, with some shyness and embarrassment, she looked at her sister, removing her spiked-heeled spotted pumps, and she felt out of place and undressed in her red running shoes, the thin cotton socks.
    
    
    
      “Keep your man and you’ll wear black. And, for God’s sake, you are not a teenager, so stop dressing like one!”
    
    
    
      Amanda blushed. She was sued to hear Ellison – and sometimes Pepper – complaining about her clothes attire, but having a complete stranger say those things out loud, it was… it was like a cry for help, a declaration of sort. 
    
    
    
      Lin was right. She did dress like a teenager. She knew Ellison and Pepper’s style wasn’t quite her thing, but she guessed she could meet them somewhere in the middle. She could do dressy, and stylish and something suited for her age without having to look like them, remaining herself – no, _reinventing_ herself. 
    
    
    
      New job, new city, new life… maybe, in time, even new love?
    
    
    
      She relaxed in the armchair, and sighed at closed eyes, sipping the pink wine gently offered by Carlos as she and Ellison dipped their feet in some exquisite scented hot water, bubbles ticking their soles, May and Lin already hard at work on their costumers’ hands.
    
    
    
      Neither of them saw the young man staring at open mouth out of the shop window, swallowing hard, mesmerized by the sight before him. 
    
    
    
      He had already liked the… plain Amanda Heart he had met before, but now, with the hair, and the dress, and getting a manicure, she was… she was a whole other thing.
    
    
    
      And he wasn’t sure he liked that one bit.
    


	7. Chapter 7

Amanda stood nervously on her pretty middle-high heels, shifting her weight from foot to foot, right before the entrance of the Gramercy Park Hotel. She bit her lips, never daring to lift her eyes from the cold concrete of the city of New York. Even the Hotel’s doorman was looking at her with pity: she had been there for over twenty minutes, waiting for a man who hadn’t showed up, not dared to call to say he was late or just not showing up at all. 

She looked at her phone. She guessed she could call, if she wanted to. She had his number, after all. But was Clint really interested in hearing from her? Besides, he was an Avenger, for God’s sake – maybe he had more pressing matters than an arranged date with Tony’s childhood friend…

Shaking her head, she sighed, and started looking around for a taxy when she heard a very sexy male voice calling her own name.

“Amanda?” She lifted her gaze, and met Clint’s nervous smile. He looked a little lost, almost as he was a child, and he was scratching the back of his neck. “Sorry I’m late. My brother argued with his girlfriend, and he needed a shoulder to cry on, and I lost track of time. It’s not really an excuse, but…”

She shook her head, giddy with excitement. He was there. He hadn’t stood her up. He hadn’t forgotten or just decided it wasn’t worth his time. “No, it’s – it’s okay. It’s family. I understand.” She said, shivering. She hugged herself, even if it had little to do with the temperature, and everything with the atmosphere, the man right before her. Clint… he was a nice man, and… and he was good looking, and, as he was proving in that moment, he didn’t need a smoking or suit and tie to be elegant – a nice shirt with a black jacket and black jeans could do the trick, too. 

Yep. She should _really_ have dated more – there was no excuse for her behavior if not her lack of experience. 

“Are you cold?” He asked, as he made to take his jacket off. She shook her head, not trusting her voice, and decided that it’d be wiser not voicing the real reason behind her trembling. 

“All right. Let’s go, then.” His hand touched the small of her back, and he led her through the hotel’s hall, towards the glassy elevator. He told the lift attendant their floor – the 18th, where the hotel’s terrace stood- and stood close to her, so close that their sides were touching,his hand always on her back. It felt… hot, as he was burning his imprint on her skin through the soft fabric of her dress. 

The doors opened up, and Amandaremained speechless, breathless. The Terrace – as the restaurant was aptly named - had a marvelousgarden setting. Tiny lights enlightened romantically and subtly the landscape, giving it a dreamy atmosphere. White linens covered the table, and the chairs in metal had air of French café, despite the cute pillows decorated with green leaves as it was in fashion. There was also a lot of _real_ leaves too, with the many tropical plants that filled the space. Soft music – live, she noted, accompanied them, making the silence less awkward. Dreamily, she hummed along. 

“I’m sorry- were you singing?” He didn’t seem sarcastic, she noted, surprised, as she stopped and stared at him. He seemed, if nothing else, serious. 

“What? Oh, no- just humming along. I’ve been advised to not sing, no matter what.”

Clint blushed. “Yeah. Uh, I’m sorry. It’s just that, my hearing’s not perfect. An incident when I was a kid. And then a sonic arrow. And then I fell from a rooftop. A few times. Low sounds are kind of hard to catch.”

“Oh.” She didn’t add another word. What else was she supposed to say, after all? The way Clint had spoken, he didn’t need nor compassion or pity. He had simply stated a fact. _I’m partly deaf,_ as he was talking about the weather.

As they walked towards their table, a few citizens and some public figures stopped Clint to congratulate him, thank him for his service and the likes. He’d had a word for everyone, would always be polite, but his hand would never leave the small of her back, nor he would give anyone too much attention. And he would always, always introduce her - _Professor Amanda Heart, she is my guest this evening._

“Have I already told you how nice you look?” He asked.

She gave a small laugh. “ A few times, actually, but please, don’t stop on my account.”

He smiled, and whispered in her ear, “You look nice, Amy.”

She lowered her eye, and blushed. “You cleaned up pretty nicely, too,” she stated, giggling.

Clint lowered his eyes and shook his head, amused. Then, with a mischievous grin, he met her eyes, and chuckled. “Ok, I was forgetting something – I got this for you.”

From his jacket pocket, he produced a miniature box and offered it to her; it was in transparent plastic, keeping safe a sort of pin – the smallest red rosebuds she had ever seen, in the same color of her dress,decorated with a golden bow. 

“Oh- thanks, Clint. You didn’t have to…” She pinned the brooch in the neckline of her dress, and skimmed over the delicate petals, as soft as silk, her lips slightly parted in astonishment. When she lifted her gaze, the breath died in her throat – Clint’s focus was far away, his eyes looking at the flowery jewel, right near the valley between her breasts. His Adam’s apple was bobbing, his eyes melting her skin with their fiery passion and his molten desire. 

_ It’s the dress, and the whole situation. He would never look at you like you were more than a friend,  _ she chastised herself. Clint was good-looking and… nice. She liked his company, but falling for him wasn’t wise – not when there was so much going on in her life like in that moment. She knew it, and yet, there was something in her heart, an ache she felt he could heal.

Not that it matter right now, she thought, sighing dreamily. They were there, together, she had.. won him, and it was all that mattered. 

“You know…” He cleared his throat as he lifted his hand, signaling for a waitress. “I didn’t immediately recognize you. I thought you… ditched me, I guess. Then I remembered the dress and the hair.”

She lifted an eyebrow, quizzically, wondering when and how he had learnt of her hair, when she had gotten the haircut only that very afternoon. She was about to ask him the very question when they were interrupted by a young man, offering them two menus. 

“I think… I’ll take a Cesar Salad, and a steak with potatoes, and for the lady here…” He looked at her, and Amanda was a little bit surprised. She was sued to men assuming they knew what she wanted, never asking for her opinion. On anything. 

“Uh – I think I’ll take the fall squash salad, and the roasted chicken with spinach.”

“Mind if I choose the wine?” he asked, and she shook her head. She wasn’t a coineseur anyway – allowing her to choose their wine wouldn’t have done them any good. “So, Tasha, my Russian super-spy friend? Says we _have_ to try this….” He looked through the wines, until he ha-haed satisfied.  “This _Pierre-Yves Colin-Morey Bourgogne Rose de Pinot Noir._ Says it’s going to change our whole prospective on Rose wines. Which, I have to tell you – it’s already high. I mean, Kate’s always off drinking this stuff….”

“Kate?A girlfriend I don’t know of? Should I be worried, Mister Barton?” She asked, looking quizzically at him, but amused. She was joking – of course she was. Clint was too flirty to be dating someone else. Besides, according to her sources, he was still mourning the loss of his wife, so...

“Kind of my sidekick? Only, don’t tell I called her that, she’d kick my ass. Eh, what can I say? Few years back I thought about retiring, and Kate – Bishop, guess you may know her, she used to run in Tony’s circle, too – anyway, she picked my mantle up. When I came back, we decided that there could be _two_ Hawkeye – only, by then, my brother was masquerading as me, too, so…”

He shrugged, but the, realizing what he had just done, swallowed hard, and blushed. Nervously, he scratched the back of his neck. “Crap. Did I just tell you the secret identity of another fellow hero? Don’t tell anyone I did. I swear I don’t know how I could be a spy – I’m just _awful_ at this secret identity thing.” 

Smiling and joking and talking freely, as they were old friends, they eat their hors d’oeuvres. The music suddenly changed, and Clint looked as Amanda took a dreamy expression as she looked at the small stage at one end of the room. “Do you want to dance with me?”

She clicked her tongue against her palate. “I don’t dance- trust me, it’s safer for the world at large if I don’t venture near the dance floor.”

“That’s what I like about you, Amanda – no pretense. You just say what you think. I never have to wonder if you’re being honest. For someone whose living has been lies and mislead, it’s… refreshing.”

She was about to ask him what he meant by that, when they were interrupted by another waitress with their mains. For the rest of the meal, Clint was pleasant, his smile ready, and Amanda couldn’t help but reciprocate. 

It didn’t mean that she wasn’t flushed,nor that warmth wasn’t filling her whole heat in a way completely different from anything she had ever felt before. 

_ *** _

As they approached her door, Amanda whished that New York wasn’t as polluted as it was, and that, lifting her eyes, she could see moonlight and stars. Clint was walking beside her, and Amanda wishfully hoped for the evening to last longer.

A couple of potted plants in full bloom were at each side of her door, and a wind chime sang, lulled by a gentle breeze. “It looks very nice. Kind of cozy. It kinds of remind me of…” He didn’t end the sentence. Clint swallowed, hard, and looked as someone had just stabbed him through the heart. He sighed, shaking his head, and leaned against the doorframe with his left shoulder, looking at Amanda struggling with her keys. “Works going well? You and Cho did made any progress in whatever you two are doing?”

She chuckled, moving away from her eyes a stray strands of hair, pretending she hadn’t noticed how he had switched topics. “Yeah. We’re good. We’ve got a couple of… leads, and it’s, you know, promising.” He nodded, as he was lost in his thoughts, and yet his eyes couldn’t let it go of her. Amanda shivered against his scrutiny, and, swallowing, wondered what he meant – if he had hoped she would stick around a bit longer, if he wanted her to.

“Do you want to come in for a cup of coffee?” She asked, her voice low, trembling, and he just nodded. 

She touched a light switch and the entire lower floor was suddenly illuminated in a low light, giving the ambience a magical air. She kicked off her shoes as she went to the kitchen to turn her espresso machine on. “I had fun tonight. Don’t get me wrong, but… I wasn’t expectingto.”

“In truth, neither did I.” he admitted. “Last time I went out with a woman, it was with Laura – my… my wife.”

“Married young?” She prepared two mugs, barely noticing what she had asked, as it had been just an afterthought. 

“Yeah,” he sat down, pinched the bridge of his nose. “Right out of high school. Laura, she wanted the whole domestic thing- babies, garden, white fence. But… I ended up in trouble helping Barney up, and SHIELD told me it was either them or jail. Suddenly she was married to a spy… we just put the kids on hold, because who wants kids in this line of work? And then, an idiot run a red light because he had promised his daughter to get back home in time for dessert…” He closed his eyes and took a big breath, his eyes almost closed, thin lines on his masculine features.

Heavy silence fell between them. Amanda’s eyes were wet with tears, but she didn’t allowed herself to cry them. Clint was hurting too much already: she didn’t want to add to his misery. As he sipped his coffee, she played with her spoon, nervously. 

“I should have landed in Hawaii by now…” She said, chuckling, hoping that the new subject would make him forget, even if just for a little while, his problems, his sufferings. “It was supposed to be my wedding day. Today. And, trust me when I say that _this dress_ is way better than what I was supposed to be wearing.”

Clint’s laser-like focus went on Amanda. He studied her, looked at her as he wanted to memorize each and every feature of the woman before him. He whispered, “This is the first time I’ve been out with a woman after Laura.”

“Uh-huh.” Speeches didn’t seem to be Amanda’s best features at the moment. 

“I’m glad Pepper arranged this raffle. I had fun.” He tilted his head to the side. “Did you?”

“Yes,” she nodded, blushing. “I did. I liked especially when you kept complimenting me. Said I was beautiful.”

He paused, then, his voice but a whisper, as it was a confession, he added. “You are.”

Amanda shivered, shivers made even more intense by his deep stare. Clint swallowed, then, slowly, agonizingly so, he leaned forward, and his breath touched her face as he silently asked for permission. Her lids semi-closed, she simply nodded.Clint’s lips barely gazed hers, and yet, when they parted, she swallowed a sigh, and her heart thundered crazily in her ribcage.

From the other side of the table, Clint smiled at her. “I’m glad we’re becoming friends, Amanda. I really like being with you.”

Amanda gave a solemn and slow nod, but the breath was dying in her throat.She already knew she was doomed. 


	8. Chapter 8

The sun was shining on that particular morning, when Amanda walked with spring in her steps and a soft heart. Everything was coming up roses: she loved her job, she had gotten a restyle, and she had decided that she would have savored the memory of Clint’s soft kiss for a very long time to come. His touch had been soft, delicate and yet thrilling… but she knew it had been an once in a lifetime occurrence. He wouldn’t have kissed her again, and she was cool with that. 

Also, had she mentioned how she really, really loved her job and how many progresses she and Cho were making?

She suddenly stopped at the nearest Starbuck, where she had quickly become a regular. Seeing that at the register there was Julie, a high school teen who had been there for a while, warmed her heart. “Hey, Jules. So, I’m in the mood for a change… what about a Pumpkin Chai latte?”

Julie nodded, but it was like her expression was devoid- like her mind was somewhere else. She was staring at Amanda, who asked, “Something wrong? Do I have something on my face?” Julie nodded, gave Amanda her beverage and her change, and kept staring as she was facing something alien. 

“Right. Have a good day, then…” Amanda left the coffee shop with a lifted eyebrow, wondering what was wrong with the young girl, then decided that, after all, it wasn’t her business. And yet, she kept thinking about the teen’s odd behavior until she reached the Stark Building, coffee still warm in hand. She was juggling her cup, her purse and some other items trying to free her right hand so that she could scan it when one of her coworkers, Danny something, stepped in, keeping her coffee for her. 

“Here, let me, Dr. Heart.” He said. “Let me help you. Oh, and you do look lovely- I’m ashamed to admit I barely recognized you!” She blushed, but she guessed he was wright. She was wearing some of the clothes Ellison had chosen, and she was sporting a new haircut. 

“Ah, thank you!” She blushed. 

Inside, another guy kept the door open for her. 

“Well, look at you, doll. You surely are a sight for sore eyes…” He chuckled, shamelessly.Amanda lifted her eyes, and found herself face to face with Bucky Barnes. She hadn’t recognized him immediately, and she felt a little bit silly. Silly - and at loss for words. “I’d stay and chat, but I’ve been summoned by Fury. I’ll see you when I’ll see you, doll.”

Amanda stood in the grand hall of the building a bit dumbstruck, looking, open-mouthed and speechless, and the World War II veteran reaching the main lift, casually walking like everything was all right in the world and he was in complete control of the situation. She was awoken by her daze by someone grabbing her elbow, and walking with her towards one the elevators. 

“Looks like someone is getting some admirers… Clint’s not gonna be happy about it.” 

Amanda lifted both eyebrows at the Soviet redhead spy. “…What?” She asked, after the longest time, not believing it for one second.She was a lot of things, but not a man eater. Or even a seductress. Natasha tsk-tsked her, and proudly produced, from her jacket pocket, the latest Stark Phone. She scrolled through apps and images like she was born for it, and showed her the latest trending tweet inside the company: it was taken from a D-List gossip site, and someone in management had reposted it – and tagged it with her name. 

It was a picture of her. And Clint. At Dinner. And she had this amazing new look Xavier and Ellison had studied for her. Well, at least she now knew why Jenny had looked at her so weirdly. Inamatter of speaking, her new look had made the front page.

As they walked towards Amanda’s office/lab, many other men offered her help, saluted her, kept doors open and the likes. One of the interns even asked if she wanted coffee, which had never happened since she had started working there. As she sat at her chair, Amanda paled, and turned to look at Natasha, standing at cross-arms, and smirking,at the door. 

A thought crossed her mind: Natasha was beautiful and a spy, of course she would know how to deal with that! “What’s a good strategy to deal with this?”

Natasha, still at crossed arms, slowly walked towards Amanda. There was an odd eyes in the redhead’s eyes the scientist didn’t like one tiny bit. She was thinking about something- and it wasn’t anything good. “Well, you could let them think your affection lies elsewhere. You like Clint…”

Amanda pouted. “I don’t… we’re just friends!” 

Natasha sighed, pinching the elegant and delicate bridge of her nose. “Anyway- like him,being friends, it doesn’t matter. People saw that picture and made assumption- you let them make them.”

“You mean, you want me to… that Clint and I…” She swallowed.

Natasha nodded, beaming up with happiness. “Yes, exactly! But, I have to tell you – Bucky will keep tease you anyway. He just _loves_ being mean to Clint!”

***

Although she was giving her back to the door,the moment Clint walked into her office Amanda just _knew –_ as she was attuned to his very presence; with an half-smile, cup of coffee in one hand, the other pushing invisible buttons on her table, she turned her head to look at the man. 

“Please tell me you don’t have chocolate or flowers for me.” she indicated with her chin her desk. There were single roses, a few bouquets – small, fortunately – and chocolate boxes in all sizes and tastes. 

Clint lifted an eyebrow, quizzically. “Oh, the picture on the company’s newsletter _and_ Twitter Account. That’s why you’ve reverted back to baggy clothes and a pony-tail? Because you’ve got a line of men ready to try to win you over?”

Smiling, she shook her head and turned to face him. She had wanted to give him her back, decided that just a couple of words would have done, but there was something between she and Clint that Amanda couldn’t deny- like electric current. Besides, he had been kind enough to come and see her…

She blushed lightly, lowered her eyes on her cup, hoping to hide somehow her reaction to his words… and his very presence. “I’ve been given flowers, chocolate, coffee, books people thoughts I would have enjoyed and so on. All because of those damn picture! Like I was looking for… for something!”

Which, she didn’t. She had had enough. No more men. It was time to focus on work, work, work.She had been given a chance: she wasn’t going to spoil it for anything- nora husband, a boyfriend or… or even just some fun between the sheets. 

“Are those running shoes?” Clint asked lowering his eyes to her feet. “Please, tell me you aren’t the kind of woman who thinks that running shoes are a fashion statement, or whatever.”

Amanda chuckled. “Nah. Sometimes I jog. I like Central Park this time of the year. Air clears my head.”

“Maybe…” Clint sighed, as he was thinking deeply – maybe even too much- about sometimes. Crossing his arms, he leaned with his back against the door. “Maybe we could go for a jog sometimes?”

“Maybe?” She gave a shrug.

“Sunday morning? Nine O’ clock – not too early, not too late..”

“Ah, I don’t know, maybe I should check my calendar…”

Clint laughed, and Manda blushed, because… because she _liked_ that sound, and it turned her insides in something… mushy, filled them with liquid heat.

“C’mon, Amanda. It’s not like I’m proposing. It’s just a run. Maybe not even that, just two friends taking a jog together. No big deal.” 

Two friends. She was starting to get… ideas. Wandering if he knew what he was talking about. She had… doubts, about them, and her own strength when it came to Clint Barton.

And then…. She gasped, blushing furiously, when her conversation with Natasha came back to mind.

Clint was her friend – or so he claimed. And Natasha said that there was only one way to get back into anonymity and discourage unwanted suitors. 

“You just thought of something.” He chuckled. 

“Well, yes,” She admitted, blushing, lowering her eyes. “If you are serious about doing things together… I’d really like that. Because I was thinking… if people were to see us together… they would stop act so… childishly, and I could go back to my anonymity.” 

Clint sighed, and crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, if this is gonna help you and your mental health…”

A delicious shiver run down her arms, and when she looked at him, reality slapped her on the face. 

Clint just wanted to help her out. He just wanted to be a good friend. 

Only problem was, she didn’t know how to convince herself of this simple fact.

***

A whole afternoon oftraining had left Clint tired, with aching bones and muscles, grumpy and just plain hungry. 

A steak. That was what he needed. Or maybe fish and chips. 

He was already looking for his car keys when he remembered his conversation with Amanda, her foolish plan to get rid of the line of unwanted suitors. 

He sighed, moaning. Thinking about Amanda meant thinking about THE KISS, a kiss that had started out as chaste, but had given him too many problems for his own good.

Because he knew she was trouble, and that Tony practically worshipped the very ground she walked on and he really loved as she was family… but… he wanted more. 

He liked talking with her, seeing her smiling, her eyes shining… she was beautiful and smart and quite frankly, when he was around her, he completely forgot they both had baggage. All he could think was her, and the possibilities of more kisses, and the promise of things to come. 

He looked at his phone. Was he supposed to call her and ask her if she wanted to hang around with him? 

_ No,  _ he thought, dismissing the idea. He wasn’t a teenage any longer. He thought about saying he was passing in the neighborhood, but decided it was a lame excuse as well.

At the end, when she opened him after he had knocked at her door, he simply went for “hi” and “Do you want to have a steak?”

She smiled at him, asked him if she was undressed ( _Nah, it’s just this small place, mostly families and working class.)_ and they started to talk. 

And talk. 

And talk some more. 

They talked and smiled and laughed all the way to the restaurant, and during the meal as well. 

They were about to get dessert when the conversation fell on the topic of Natasha, all because one of the desserts had a name that sort of sounded Russian. 

“So…” Amanda asked, running a finger around the rim of her wineglass. “Is it a state secret or can you tell me how long you’ve know Natasha?”

“Natasha, eh?” Clint clicked his tongue, and thought for a second. “Well, over a decade? We’re pushing fifteen years, I think.”

“But you can’t tell me how you met her.”

He chuckled, reached out with his right hand, and covered hers, interlacing lazily their fingers. “Well, that I can’t tell you. Unless you secretly have SHIELD level 7 clearance?”

“What do you think you are doing, Mister Barton?” She asked, sipping her red. It was a very good wine, and together with Clint’s company, it was making her tipsy, and very, very happy.

“But giving some juice to the grapevine, of course.” He tightened his loose grip around her fingers, and made a small movement in the general direction at her back. “Just don’t turn, but there’s a guy having dinner, and he works for Stark. First thing he did when he saw us passing by was getting his thumbs in action.”

She carefully slipped her hand from beneath his own, smiling lazily. “Okay great performer, enough for now. I was promised steak and salad, and I kind of need both my hands.” 

“Right.” Silence fell between them, a bit uncomfortable now that he wasn’t holding her hand any longer, and then, he suddenly thought of something. A passing-by thought. “You should get a dog. Or maybe a cat.”

“Wow, totally random, eh? Uh, no. No cats, no dogs. Not my cup of tea.”

Clint studied her, smiling. “I was thinking, you aren’t a people person either, and yet, I see how people act around you. They love you.”

She looked taken aback. “How do you know I’m not a people person?”

“I may be the lamest Avengers, but Iget around, Kid.”

Amanda just took a big breath, sipping her drink carefully. “I don’t know. An animal? Seems like a huge commitment to me…”

Clint smiled slowly. It was exactly what it sounded like to him. “So, how long are you planning to work for Tony?”

“Well, it depends. The contract is for a full year. One of Cho’s fellows is about to give birth and took an extended leave.”

“Triplets, I’ve heard.” Clint nodded. “You plan to have kids someday?”

“Well, I’m not totally against the idea, but I want to have a life of my own first.” She looked at him skeptical. He was full of random facts and questions that evening.

“Well, maybe the Higher Up has another plan for you. Case. fate. God. Whatever you want to call it.”

She nodded, and Clint went on. 

“New York is beautiful in the Winter. You can go Ice-skating in Central Park, you know? Kind of like where I grew up. And let’s not forget how they light up the city for Christmas. Even if, you want to know what the best part is?” He lowered his voice, as they were talking in hushed tones, conspiratorially. “Last year? We had _Barnes_ playing Santa for the employees’ children.”

She gave a wry smile, picturing Barnes in the bright red Santa suit.

“So, back to something more serious. You are here for an year. Then what?” Clint knew he was rambling, but he couldn’t stop himself. even if he wasn’t sure what he wanted out of life, where he was going with this woman, he felt an urgency to be aware of her plans.

She shook her head. “I honestly don’t know.”

“You could not know here. I mean, from what I saw, Tony would be thrilled to offer you a position. Any position.”

She cut off a piece of her cake. “You know, I think Natasha gave the same cake to me on my first day on the job…”

Clint looked in her eyes, and grinned. “So you know, I won’t fall for this trick.”

She sighed. 

She should have known better. 


	9. Chapter 9

When she saw the red pickup parking before her apartment, Amanda checked one last time her watch. Happy wasn’t on time – matter of fact, he was over half-an hour late. She hadn’t known Tony’s assistant/bodyguard/driver for long, and yet, he had never, _ever_ done something like that, to her knowledge. 

She slammed the door shout and strode towards the vehicle, and glared through the windows at Happy, her arms crossed. “Mr. Hogan, I understand this is merely a favor, but I _really_ need my storage space freed mid-afternoon lunch and…” When the man in the car smiled at her, her heart did a funny dance and she blushed, almost stuttering for words. “ _Clint?!_ What are you doing here? I was… I was expecting Mr. Hogan!”

“Happy had urgent last minute Stark business to attend to, and I’ve been asked to give you an hand, as I had nothing better to do with my time today.” He smiled, as he left the vehicle and leaned against the open door. He wore Jeans, simple tennis shoes and one of his signature t-shirts, light violet and with some elaborate writing on it that made it look like some kind of mural. 

“You don’t have to…” She lowered her eyes a little, blushing. “I mean, I’m sure you have things to do and….”

Clint just shrugged. “Movie marathon at that small theatre in the neighborhood with my brother kind of sum up my social calendar nowadays.”

She laughed. “Okay, then. Thanks for the help. And the company, too. Much appreciated.” She bit her lips, apparently lost in thoughts. “You and Barney really go to the movie together?”

“There’s a _Transporter_ marathon, and Barney just _loves_ Transporter. Why, you want to tag along?” 

She chuckled. “Oh, please. A few hours with me, clearing my storage unit, and you’ll beg to be rid of me by the time we’ll be back here.”

“You’re such a pessimist, Amanda Heart…”

“I’m not a pessimist, I’m just a realist.” She smiled, and he shook his head, giving her one of his brightest smiles ever. 

“All right. You know what? Let’s start driving. But first, coffee. I can’t do anything without my coffee.”

“Areyou sure we’re not gonna ticketed in this spot?” Clint asked as, over an hour later, they were finally at the storage unit Amanda was using. He released a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Driving had always been reserved for the farm and the country, the small town he came from, while, in the city, his favorite means of transportation had always been the metro, unless there was someone _asking_ him to act as the driver. 

“It’s for loading and unloading. We’re good.”

“Are you completely sure? Because if this beauty here gets ticketed, Cap’s gonna give me one of his lectures, and I’ve been at the receiving ends of enough of his lectures to last a lifetime.” Amanda lifted both her eyes quizzically. “C’mon, you thought that _Tony_ owned a pickup? Really?”

“Right.” She sighed, eyeing her fingers. Great. She had eat trash food and drank coffee in Captain America’s pickup. She checked to see if there were any stains, and hoped she hadn’t missed any of them. The man was a national treasure, she just couldn’t soil his car. Nope. Not at all. 

Clint smiled, and left the vehicle, soon followed by Amanda. She took the key to her unit, and went for it. It was very small, just a few stacks of boxes occupied the middle of the room. And then, there were few pieces of furniture, and among them a rocking chair, black wood and brown leather seating, modern and yet comfy. As soon as she saw it, Amanda smiled a little, and went to skim the leather, delicately, with a sad smile and teary eyes. “It’s just from IKEA, you know, but it was a gift from my Grandmother, when my mum had Ellie. She loved it, you know. Cherished it, even.”

Clint sighed, feeling a little broken inside. He knew loss, knew how much it could hurt, how certain wounds could never get better, heal completely.

“Are you okay?”

Amanda sniffed, but nodded. “Yeah, it’s just that, I’ve never been able to live up to my parents’ expectation. I wasn’t as competitive as dad, as beautiful and feminine as mum and Ellie. I was their little ugly duckling.”

“I’m sure you are wrong, Amanda.”

She sat on the chair, and shook her head. “No. I was just an embarrassment. They never wanted me around. Never wanted to share anything with me.”

Clint kneeled down and took her hand. He stroked the soft skin, then his gaze moved to her eyes. “You have a lot of friends and family who love you and care for you.” He swallowed, his heart losing a beat. “God knows I do.”

She nodded. “C’mon, let’s grab your stuff and let’s go back home.” She gave him a teary, small smile, and all he wanted to do was taking her in his arms; he was about to, but she linked her arms around his neck first, her head against his chest, his heartbeat a sweet lullaby to her ears as he inhaled her scent – cinnamon and lemon and just Amanda.Neither of them pulled away for the longest time, and they parted only so that Clint could rest his forehead against hers. 

“Thank you, Clint.” She whispered. 

“Anytime, Amanda, anytime.”

When she finally eased from him, their gazes connected, and they leaned towards each other slowly, until their lips touched, and neither of them pulled away for what seemed the longest time. 

Reluctantly, he had to stand, putting some distance between them.

Clint cleared his voice, scratching the back of his head as he looked at a couple of pieces of furniture. “Wow. Nice desk. Is that antique?”

Amanda shook her head. “Nah, both the desk and its chair are reproduction. They were a gift from Howard and Maria.”

“Right. Of course Starks would gift a child with furniture instead of puppets.” He sighed. “Maybe I should have really left Bucky tag along. We could have used some of that Super-soldier strength to do the heavy lifting…”

“Barnes?”

Clint nodded. “Yeah. Guy’s either crushing on you, or…” he stopped himself before finishing the sentence. Fact was, he and Bucky had a sort of… sibling rivalry going on, and Bucky just _loved_ to tease him. He wouldn’t have past the WWII soldier to flirt with Amanda only as a mean to unnerve the Avengers’ resident archer. “Anyway, you are a beautiful woman. Men are bound to show an interest.”

She blushed.” Stop it, Barton, or this box might slip from my hands and land on your foot.”

He grinned, so glad that she was back with that smile and the fire in her eyes. “Just because I said you are a beautiful woman?”

“It’s just me, Clint. Same old Amanda Heart.”

“Nah,” Clint chuckled. “Your inner beauty is now evident on the outside. You are a beautiful woman, Amanda. Just accept it.”

She blinked, opened her mouth and then closed it again. And Clint couldn’t stop grinning: he had made her speechless. 

A good hour later, Clint was parking before his apartment building. “I’ve got to feed Lucky before we head for your place.” He simply said, and she simply nodded. She was tired, and emotionally drained: looking at what was left of her old life had been more painful than what she had first assumed. “Ehy, I was wondering, are you hungry?”

She laughed. “Yeah. I’m positively starving.” She lifted her chin a little, looking at the small building. “Which apartment is yours?”

He laughed. “Technically? All of them. _But,_ third floor, second window? That’s my escape from super-hero-ing.”

She followed him inside, walked the stairs up to his floor. Before they could reach his door, four people left their apartment and stopped to talk with him, thank him for something, offering him cake in one case- and complimenting him for his new “cure girlfriend”, saying that “it was about time” he moved on. 

He blushed, adoringly, as he turned the key in the lock. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why they assumed you are my girlfriend. Well, could be the only other woman ever coming down here is Nat, and they know she is too smart to be dating little old me.”

Lucky enthusiastically greeted them as soon as the door was open, so much so that Clint almost landed on his ass. Amanda looked around while he dealt with his dog, asserting the whole place – hardwood floor, leather and steel and iron. “An impressive example of a man-cave.” 

He grinned sheepishly. “Yeah. I could use some womanly touches, but Nat’s worse than me, and I’d die before asking Pepper or Tony for Help. Besides, I _hate_ froufrou – couches with peonies, tiny rigs, lace, lavender potpourri….”

“God saved us from lavender potpourri.”

Clint laughed, barely resisted taking her in his arms and shout her up – maybe with a kiss. “You want something to drink.”

She pretended to be thinking about it. “Later, maybe. Now I want to see the kitchen.”

She followed him in the next room, through an open arc, and they found themselves immediately in his kitchen; it wasn’t big, but they couldn’t exactly define it small either. It was all steel and dark wood, with industrial copper lights hanging from the ceiling right at the center of the round table in solid wood – one of the focal points, together with the huge refrigerator.

“You _really_ must love Food Network.”

“Nah. But I had to renovate it anyway, so I went a bit over the top.”

“You renovated it yourself?” She asked him, looking and skimming over the impressive furniture. She wasn’t sure why, but there was something in the place that screamed Clint’s name. His name was written all over his hard work. It was well done, but it clearly lacked a professional touch, and it looked like it had been assembled over quite a length of time.

Amanda’s heart made a little dance in her chest, and she chocked on a sob as she imagined Clint, after having just lost his wife, working on his kitchen , helping all his neighbors out as a form of therapy, a way to keep his mind away from bad thoughts and bittersweet memories. 

“Yeah.” He admitted. “I did it solo, so it took me months and months, but at the end, I had everything like I wanted it to. I wasn’t exactly out of money, even after buying the building, but, I don’t know. I guess I need to keep myself occupied. And, according to Fury, I wasn’t exactly in the right mindset to go on missions. So it was either renovating my apartment or crashing on my brother’s couch and drink myself into oblivion.” 

His eyes met Amanda, and her gentle gaze told him everything he needed to know. 

She knew - she _understood_. All of it. Even before he had to open his mouth and speak. He smiled at her, beaming, as sure as never before that she had an heart of gold, of her loving and caring nature. 

“So, what’s the deal with the building anyway? Last I heard, Avenging and spying didn’t make a man rich…”She asked, leaning against the table, facing Clint. Things were getting pretty heavy between them, she needed to break the tension and think about anything but him, and how much there was a part of her that wanted to play nurse to his broken heart. 

Clint puffed. “Long story short? Barney used to be FBI, deep undercover stuff, kind of like Donnie Brasco, you know? Brother dearest had the brilliant idea of going native, stole the boss’ money, went on the run before faking his own death for years and leaving me his money. I was thinking of giving it all away when I ran into this place, heard they were having issues, bought everything. Mobsters think two million times before trying anything with a building owned by an Avenger.”

The breath died in her throat and she blushed. _Just great._ She had hoped he would have said something that would have made Clint look a bit less amazing, and yet, all his actions made her fall deeper and deeper into his web, made him all the more fascinating in her eyes. 

He was a knight in shining armor, there was no doubt about it. and he wasn’t even trying. 

Clint was tentatively closing the distance between them, and was leaning over her. Closing her eyes foretasting impending bliss, Amanda opened her lips up, feeling his hot breath on her mouth. She sighed, her hands fisting the material of his t-shirt, when they both heard the door slamming against the wall, and they jumped at the same time, taking a step back, and looking at each other guiltily, blushing. 

“ **MY BROTHER!”** They turned, stunned, and saw Barney, arms wide open and a grin plastered to his face. When he noticed Amanda, he looked between her and his younger brother, noticed how guilty and _flustered_ they looked and the grin died. “Uh, am I interrupting something?” 

“No!” They both said at the same time, too quickly for it to be true. 

The older Barton lifted an eyebrow, as to tell them he wasn’t buying any of that, but the he shrugged – Clint was mature enough to make his own choices and live life as he saw fit, after all – then he took a big breath. “My girlfriend, Simone? She saw you two with the truck, thought you are probably tired and hungry and wondered if you were interested in lunch. Woman always cooks for an army!”

Clint pretended to be thinking about that, then he looked at Amanda, who was still speechless. “Well, if Amanda doesn’t have any problem with that,it works for me.”

“Great! You better hurry because she has already gotten the table ready! My lady said I wasn’t supposed to take no for an answer!” With that, Barney stormed off the apartment, with Clint and Amanda hot on his trail. Before they could enter the already open door next to Clint’s, Amanda, as she was a kid, tapped Clint on the shoulder to get his attention. 

“Didn’t you say your brother was this hotshot FBI undercover agent? That joined all this evil teams just to try to kill you?” Clint nodded, trying to see where she was going. “And he is scared of not following your neighbor’s orders?”

Clint grinned, not even bothering with an answer. He just guided her, an hand on the small of her back. Her shirt was think, so much so that he could feel the heat radiating from her body, felt her shiver under his touch. 

“Oh, here you are Clint. I haven’t seen you in weeks.” A thirty-something Afro-American woman approached them, followed by two running children, one around five, andanother of maybe two years old, while Barney stood in acorner, a bit embarrassed.

“CLINT!!! Can we come looking at the parade on your TV? It’s always better looking at the TV with Lucky!” The older kid said, in a hurry, jumping into Clint’s arms.

“Sure thing, buddy. Well, if mum is all right with that? Barney has the keys, so you’re welcome any time.”

Simone took her son from Clint, and ruffled his hair, gently. Amanda felt a stab of envy – her mother had never been so affectionate with her, in the short amount of time they had been granted together. “This is Charlie, and the running toddler is Sam. You must be Clint’s friend, Amanda – Barney told me all he knew about you!”

“Oh, thank you.” Amanda said, then, she looked around, and saw a small garden on the window sill. “Oh, whatbeautiful flowers!” 

“They are crocuses – I even have some saffron plants, but I keep them in the kitchen. The flowers are beautiful, but they only last a couple of days…” she motioned for them to follow them into the kitchen, where a squared table was ready for the adults; plats were also on the coffee table, in the small living room. 

A timer went off.

“Well, lunch’s ready!” Simone said, clapping her hands. 

“Can we help with anything?” Amanda asked. 

“No, no, you are my guests. Just sit at the table, will you? I have everything under control.”

Clint squeezed her shoulder. “Trust her, she isn’t lying. C’mon.”

They sat, Clint in front of Amanda, Barney before the empty spot reserved to Simone, and looked at the woman bringing a platter of London broil.

“Something tells me you’re not a vegetarian,” Simone told Amanda. “Clint, you’re out of your “my body is a temple” phase, right?”

Clint blushed, a bit annoyed. “Oh, c’mon, you know it only lasted a few days!”

Simone shook her head and Amanda smiled, as the lady of the house served potatoes and peas, as scented and succulent as the meat.

As they eat and he heard Amanda laughing at something Simone had said, Clint’s gaze went from his brother to the girl next door, and he didn’t miss the adoration in Barney’s eyes, and he recalled the discussion they had had a few days before. 

He swallowed hard, realizing that he had just solved the mystery of Barney’s mystery lady.

Yep. His older brother was dating Simone indeed.

A couple of hours later, after lunch and a coffee and a lot of chit-chat, Clint was still musing on his discovery as he parked in front of Amanda’s place. “Barney. And Simone. I can’t believe it.”

“Yes, he is very sweet with her.”

“You understood it too?”

Amanda shook her head. “It was a bit obvious. Besides, they are very comfortable with each other.”

“Yeah, I saw that. I just can’t understand how the hell it happened. They are so different….”

Amanda shrugged, looking for Clint’s eyes. “We’re different, too, and yet we are friends.”

Clint took a deep breath, letting his head hitting the headrest. “I think they may be more than friends. Barney hinted about being serious with a girl, a few days ago. I just didn’t think he could be talking about Simone.”

Amanda was ready to leave the vehicle and start working on rearranging furniture when she saw Clint stalling. He was tapping his index against the wheel, clearly lost in thoughts, or buying time. “So, I was thinking… there’s this huge barbecue at the Tower in a few days, one of those party not tomiss. I thought that, maybe, I could swing by and pick you up.”

Amanda sighed. “I don’t know, Clint. I’ll think about it, but….” She closed her eyes, and swallowed. “Clint, you are being great at keeping all those over enthusiastic suitors at bay, but….”

“I hate buts….” He muttered. 

“But maybe we should… discuss where we go from there.”

“And here she goes and ruin it all.” Clint sighed. “Why do we have to over-complicate matters? Can’t we just enjoy each other’s company?”

“But, I do Clint. Only… we have to accept that this isn’t strictly real and…”

“Oh, you mean our kisses? You mean those aren’t real?” He asked, and Amanda’s eyes widened. Of course Clint would have found a way to talk, finally, about their kisses.

She blushed, and nodded. “I’m just saying that we should remember that, these past few days, you’ve been gallantly helping me out. With the suitors problem.”

Clint’s face hardened, and he pinned her down with his intense gaze. “Amanda, trust me – gallantry is the least thing on my mind when I kiss you.” 

She turned her head away, alarmed by his words. She wasn’t the kind of woman for him – Clint didn’t deserve a shy nerd, a bookworm. His women were surely very different. 

Going to that party with him was a bad idea. No, she’d stay home instead, she told herself, and read a book. Or work on some other projects.

All the while, whishing she was a stronger woman. 


	10. Chapter 10

Stark had probably disappointed Pepper yet again – it had to be that. Clint knew that, when there was only strangely flavored coffee in the kitchen or the lounge, it was because Pepper had suggested it and Tony had accepted, feeling guilty for something – anything at all, really.

The archer sighed. No one was around any longer – everybody had probably already escaped the hellish stuff nightmares were made of,hoping to find something more similar to everyone’s favorite beverage. With eyes heavy with lack of sleep, Clint left the building, and marched towards the coffee cart that was perennially parked near Stark Tower. Looking up, he noticed Amanda walking in his direction, and he smiled. He hadn’t had the best of days so far, and a dose of Amanda Heart would have done him good. 

She gave him a friendly wave, then suddenly turned and walked in the opposite direction.

That was odd, he thought between himself. He decided to call her later, maybe ask her out to lunch or dinner. Just to make sure everything was all right.

He smiled, thinking that it was really a great idea. One of his best, if he could say so.

***

“Oh, Clint, I’m so sorry, but I’ve got a budgetary meeting tonight.”

“In the middle of the week? Stark usually has those on Fridays…” Phone in hand, Clint glanced at the calendar on the wall. 

“It’s a special session. This new project we are working on is getting a lot of attention from the other departments and the management board.” 

“Okay. Sure. I get it. I’m happy people’s being enthusiastic about your work. What about tomorrow night?”

His question was met with silence. “I’m so sorry, Clint, but I’m pretty busy all this week. Why don’t we try to reschedule something next week?”

“Next week. So you aren’t going to Tony’s barbeque, either?”

“I’ve got a lot of work to do. I’ve started painting the apartment and it’s taking me longer than I thought.”

“Painting?”

“Yes, Clint. Painting. As in, the walls.”

“Yes, I know that, thank you very much.” The line went silent. “Amanda, are we okay?”

“We’re friends, Clint. Of course we are okay.”

“Friends. Right. Of course.” He was starting to actually _hate_ the word. “Are you sure you are okay? You seem a bit off today.”

“Oh, no. I’m great. Better than fine. I’ll see you around!” And without giving him the chance to say goodbye, she put the phone down. 

Clint stared at the phone. Despite her words, he felt there was something off., and he didn’t know how to handle it. How to look for clues. He could have asked Stark or Pepper, but he doubted that Amanda had told them anything. 

Clint glanced at his watch and then dialed a number he knew by heart. He needed to stop thinking about his personal problems, forget about Amanda even if it was only for a day or two, and he just knew the way to do it. 

“Everything is all right, Clint?” Steve answered, already a bit worried. It was his default mode – always assume for the worse.

“Does Sam still has that cabin near the lake? I was thinking of going fishing.”

The line went silent for a few minutes, and Clint could hear murmuring in the background. “Sure. You want some time for yourself or do you mind if we tag along?”

Clint chuckled. “I was already planning of asking you guys to join me. Just going your gear, I’ll think about food and drinks.”Then, he awkwardly cleared his throat. “Could we just keep this between ourselves? The last thing I need is Bucky’s constant teasing about, you know…”

“Our lovely miss Heart. Yeah, I noticed that he likes to flirt with her. I think he just wants to irritate you, though, being around the girl you are in love with. You guys never really get along too well, after all.You are like water and fire.”

“I’m not in love with Amanda.”

“Just keep telling yourself that.” Steve laughed.” I’ll see you at Sam’s cabin”

Once the phone call was over, Clint relaxed. Things were going to get under control again. Like they had always been after Laura. He just needed to get Amanda Heart out of his mind… and his heart.

***

It was getting late; the air was chilly, orange leaves were dancingon the ground and the sun was setting in the distance in the Jersey Pine Barrens, where Sam Wilson had a small cabin near the lake, its waters as red as the blood of the supposed many victims that had been, according to a legend,killed by the mysterious creature known as the Leeds Devil. 

“You know, I though fishing was going to be challenging and manly, but now it just seems a bit smelly.” Sam looked at the bait on his fishing rod, and twitched his nose in disgust. 

“I just don’t get it. Why a fishing cabin if you don’t go fishing?” Clint asked as the umpteenth fish took the bait. He, Sam and Steve were relaxing on the small wooden pier next to the cabin, bathing in the sun.

Sam stared at Clint in silence. “Women, Barton. This is my man’s cave. I bring women here. I mean, what else am I supposed to do? Bring them at the tower and listen nonstop to this boy scout here about how I should just settle down and marry and how bad for my soul and health one night stands are?”

“Ehy, if you don’t want to hear my lectures, you just don’t have to hang around me the whole time.” Steve chuckled as he threw the line in the calm waters of the lake. 

“Yeah, I think I should switch you for your Winter Soldier pal.” Sam laughed, grinning, and threw a ball of paper at Clint, who was grunting. “I’m sorry, is this a sensitive subject? I’ve been told that you don’t want to hear the name of the man who is threatening your territory.”

“Okay, will you two drop it? I’m not in love with Amanda!”

“But no one here says you are. Do you feel threatened, Clint? Or do you want to admit something? May be good for you, taking this weight off your shoulders…” 

“I don’t have any weight on my shoulders, Sam. And if this wasn’t your place, I’d be already kicking your ass right now.”

“Right. Because you think you could beat me? Please. I got _wings,_ Barton. Any idea how much strength it takes to carry them? _A lot._ And care to remember me what your super-power is? Hang on- you don’t have any super-power nor cool weapon.”

Steve laughed, and shook his head, humored by his two friends bickering like they were unruly kids. “You know, I’ve always been a New Yorker at heart, but this forest, stretching in every direction as far as the horizon, it’s just… it’s beautiful.” Steve said, changing the subject. 

“Yeah. Hard to believe something like that exists in New Jersey. That the barrens are still here, that they haven’t been razed to be turned into some enormous mall.” Clint said, pensive.

“It’s been tried, though. In the eighties, a proposal to turn this whole forest into a city even got approved,but the people who live here protested, and the deal fell apart. Even if there are rumors that it was because one of the developers had vanished at the hands of the Jersey Devil.” Steve snickered, something that Sam didn’t take too kindly. “C’mon, Cap, with all the aliens, sorcerers, gods and magic and all the other crazy stuff happening all the time in our lives, you are telling me you don’t think that the Jersey Devil could be real?” He asked, his eyes huge, almost in disbelief.

“Sam, people go missing in parks all the time. Even when I was a kid, it happened all the time. And anyway, according to my book, the reason the waters around here are red it’s because of the sap from the trees, soaking the ground and the water.” Steve shrugged, then shivered, despite the super-soldier serum running through his veins. “Maybe we should go back inside. It’s almost dark, and Clint caught enough fish for all of us.”

Crickets stopped to ing their song, and the Barrens fell into complete silence, making them shiver, the hair at the back of their neck rising as a dark premonition of things to come. They all heard the loud hissing, the breathing – as if something was dying – at their backs, and when they turned, with the moonlight at its back, they saw the vile creature: as red as the reddest blood. It stood, awkwardly, on two hooved feet, its bat-like, ghost-like wings wide open. It skin was almost translucent, its veins and muscles visible, even on the huge horse-like head.

“Okay, just to be clear, you are all seeing this, right?” Sam asked, and Steve and Clint both nodded. “Okay. And we all have our gear with us? I mean, tell me you are just like me, always foreshadowing the end of the world and always ready for the worst.”

“You bet.” Clint chuckled, grabbing an hunting knife, as suddenly other three creatures appeared from the woods, identical to the Jersey Devil right before them. 

Sam sighed, almost not surprised of finding a strange creature in his path, even on vacation. Then, he turned to Steve. “Pretty sure you owe me money, my friend.”

The Avengers resident archer chuckled shamelessly.Apparently, he had just gotten his wish. After all, there was nothing better than a fight with some weird-ass supernatural creature to keep a woman out of your heads and your heart.


	11. Chapter 11

It didn’t take a long time for the rumor mill to start spreading the latest juicy gossip: Avengers could never take a minute of honest rest, let alone on vacation. Amanda’s heart had lost a beat when she had been told that Clint, Sam and Steve had had an encounter of the fifth kind while fishing. Man-hunting, flesh-eating aliens- an horde of them. Go figures. It could only happen to them.

When she saw a glimpse of Clint in the lounge, mere minutes after his arrival back in the City late at night, Amanda could barely recognize him. He looked tired, and he was bandaged, his clothes thorn in all the places. He was anything like the man she knew and- she sighed, her eyes a bit teary – loved. She couldn’t deny it any longer: he wasn’t just a friend. It was written all over the way her heart went into overdrive at the mere mention of his name, or how, when she had first heard about the attack, she had been scared or never seeing him again.

She had tried to stay away from him, but she now knew that she couldn’t. Maybe love was out of the question, but she needed Clint Barton in her life. No matter what. No matter how. For as long as he would have allowed her to. 

“Clint?” She whispered his name in the half-shadows. He stood, and walked in her direction, hands in the pockets of his jeans, giving her his version of a lopsided grin. His clothes were in pieces, a five o’clock shadow darkened his features, his eyes were bloodshot, his short blondish hair stood at all kinds of awkward angles. His rumpled shirt was buttoned up all wrong, half tucked in and half out of his jeans.

“Good grief. What happened to you?” She asked, even if she had had already heard the story. Many versions of it, actually. Too many for her own liking.

He rubbed an hand over his face, and stared at Amanda, then he shook his head.

_ I couldn’t get you out of my head so I went fishing with my friends and almost got eaten alive by freaking aliens, that’s what happened to me, Amanda,  _ he thought, but decided to didn’t say it out loud. “Ah, we kind of debunked the whole Jersey Devil legend. Pretty sure we also put an end to it. Kind of worried about you, Amanda, though. You are as pale as a ghost.”

Yes, she was pale, and yet Clint could see how relieved and happy she was of seeing him. And he felt the same, too. On one side, he was relieved that he had gone out with the boys, as their fishing trip had assured to put an end to all the deaths and disappearances that had plagued the Pines. But all the time, while he was fighting those monsters, he had been thinking about her. About how much he wanted to see her again, how he didn’t want her last memory of him being their awkward conversation over the phone. The whole ordeal had made him realize one thing: she meant more to him than he had ever planned. More than he could comprehend. More than he was prepared for. 

Their eyes met and she flinched at the bruise that decorated his right eye. “Is there a place on you that isn’t bruised or bandaged?”

“You’re exaggerating.”

She blushed. “You guys really are heroes. Tony said that they had kidnapped kids… you saved them, Clint.” She walked closer to him. Her hand touched his arm with a gentle caress, and they both stared at each other. “I want to hold you but I’m afraid you may be too hurt.”

“It’s okay.” He said, taking her hand in his own. “I’m sorry I made you worry.”

He inspected her closely, looked deep into her eyes, and what he saw there, it shook him to the core. He swallowed, as he saw the eyes of another woman, years before, and yet the same look. The same…love.

The breath died in his throat, as he felt an unknown fear, a new kind of pain. He had faced aliens, monsters, beings that could take control of one’s mind, and yet, this, it shattered him. It made Clint doubt his own strength, his capability to put his own heart at risk all over again. 

“You are stiff.” She whispered as she gently skimmed over the sore muscles of his shoulder, never stopping to look into Clint’s eyes. “Let me help. Let me do this for you.”

Clint nodded, and went to sit on couch again, Amanda at his back. Slowly, carefully, with her delicate hands, she started working his sore muscles, the knots in his neck, his shoulder blades, alternating delicacy and strength. Clint kept his eyes closed in bliss the whole time, his mouth half open in a “o” of wonder as he melted under her touch.

Then, he hissed, as she touched a particularly nasty bruise his shirt was covering. “Ouch.”

“I’m sorry.” She half-screamed, jumping, as she had just burnt him, but Clint shook his head, glad she wasn’t facing him and couldn’t see the blush. 

“It’s not you. It’s just that I have aches in places I didn’t know existed.”

“You faced an horde of devil-like aliens and all you had were a bow and arrows, without an actual plan. You ought to hurt.”

“Yeah, well, you should see the other guy. And, again, just a bow and arrow.” They both smiled, as Amanda resumed her careful massage, and yet she felt tension in her muscles. Clint was an Avenger, putting his life on the line every day. But this time it had been different: he hadn’t known, going in, that he would have met trouble. It made her think about how precious and strange life was. What if the guys had stayed home? What if the aliens had overpowered them? What if none of them had had their gear with them? 

“Thank you , I’m much better now.” He said, once she felt her separating from him, feeling as cold as he hadn’t felt in a very long time. He turned his head, and saw Amanda with her hands stuffed in her pockets. “Amanda… when I’ll be out of the woods… I think we should talk.”

“Will we?” She almost gasped, blushing.

“Yeah.” He grinned, mischievously. 

“Thanks for the warning.” She answered, smiling. Still blushing. She caressed his forehead, run a hand through his hair. “You should get some sleep.” 

“What about you?” As answer, she went to seat on one of the armchairs, which amused Clint to no end. He even tried to groan. “If he sees you, Tony is going to make you leave.”

“Let him try.” She smiled, serene. He winked as she leaned back against the pillow and closed her eyes. She was just at his side, so close he could touch her. Her fingers curled around his own, he finally relaxed, forgot about his misadventure and closed his eyes. 

***

A quick glance around the room told Clint that Manda wasn’t there any longer once he woke up. He was disappointed, felt a weight on his heart, missing her already like she had been gone for days.His neck felt a little better, but his legs and arms still hurt. 

A coffee. He would have killed for a cup of coffee. And in fact, he swore he could have been smelling it right that second. 

_ Guessed I hit my head pretty hard, if I’m hallucinating coffee… _

“Are you awake or what?”

He chuckled as Natasha entered the room, followed by Barney. “Ehy superhero, we got coffee.. And doughnuts. Your favorite, from Annie’s.” 

“Dear God, now I know what someone who wrestled with the devil looks like…” Barney assumed, grimacing. He felt pain just seeing Clint’s bruises, even if the Avenger was already eating the pastry with gusto.

“This is wonderful, absolutely wonderful. And the coffee. I think I could kill for a cup of that heavenly stuff.”

Natasha smiled, turning towards Barney conspicuously. “Tony’s been arguing with Pepper, and we’ve got our kitchens filled with the flavored stuff Clint hates again.”

He lifted the warm container to his lips, his eyes closed as he inhaled the aroma, blessing the simple pleasures of life. 

“How are you feeling, brother?” Barney asked.

“Sore, but okay. Sam’s not feeling too great, too.” He put the coffee back on the table, and gave a tasty bite to his pastry. “Thanks for this, too, by the way.”

“You’re family, silly, and family takes care of each other. Even if you’re not related by blood.” Natasha told him, smiling, and Clint almost got weepy. Almost. “I talked with Barney and Simone. We’re going to bring you meals the next few days, so you don’t worry about cooking.”

“Didn’t know my brother worried about that at all.” Barney snickered, getting as answer an elbow on the side by the Russian spy. “Ehy, where’s your girlfriend, by the way? Amanda, I mean…”

Clint didn’t answer for the longest time, but then, Natasha lifted an eyebrow, looking at him a she already knew the answer and was just waiting for him for confirmation. “She was here last night. I think she went to work?”

Natasha shook her head, and Barney laughed. He messed his brother’s hair up, and laughed. “All right, Clint, gotta go to work, too. I’ll come later to drive you home, all right?Unless a certain lady of yours doesn’t show up first. In that case, good luck getting lucky.”

Natasha pushed Barney out of the room, and the both of them laughed. And Clint did something he rarely did, when his brother was concerned: he smiled, affectionate. Still, she remained in the room together with him, going as far as sitting at his side, patting gently his leg. “Barney’s a bit crass, but he is right. It’s been years, Clint. You ought to move on with your life, and accept that not everything is in your hands. Some things, they just aren’t your responsibility, nor your fault.”

Clint closed his eyes and looked away, and he heard Natasha swallow. He could hear her sufferance, her pain. “Clint, you know you are my best friend. I care about you like I’ve never cared about anyone else in my whole life. You are a good man, and you deserve the best. Think about what Ijust said, will you?

He just nodded, and looked at his friend leaving the room – a room that had never felt as empty as in that moment.


	12. Chapter 12

“Mommy, Clint’s here!” Charlie, Simone’s eldest, called out. Barney was holding the door open for his brother, who was carefully and slowly walking to his own apartment, holding his aching side. 

“Wow, Clint, look at you. You really can’t stay out of troubles.” Grimacing as she was the one hurting, she examined him from her own door. “You should start being a little more careful. You are not a cat, you know.”

“I ought to inform you that I’ve been dealing with the weird happenings of this world for over half my life, and I’m still here.” He clenched his teeth in protest, but then, he immediately sobered up, as he smelled something delicious cooking into his neighbor’s kitchen. “Is that stew? With grilled vegetables and that wonderful sauce of yours?”

She rolled her eyes, and sighed. “Yes Clint. Barney wanted to make you feel welcomed back home. Said that playing Rambo with evil aliens took a toll on you and you needed all the rest you could get.” She was smirking, the evil woman, and even from afar, even if facing her other half’s back, she could just _see_ Charles Bernard Barton blushing, as he had been caught red-handed worrying about his little brother – the same little brother he had tried to kill multiple times over the last decade.

“Oh, Hawkeye, that’s so sweet of you!” Clint chuckled, teasing his brother. 

“Don’t call me Hawkeye. I’ve been Hawkeye for five minutes. Worst five minutes of my whole life. And I’ve lived with you. In a _trailer_.”

Simone just shook and her head, and smiled. She put a reassuring hand on Clint’s shoulder, gentle and caring. “You look pale, Clint. Want to go to your room and sleep a bit?”

“I’m fine, Simone. I look worse than I feel. Besides, you should have seen the other guys – we barbequed them. Literally. I’m a bit sad, though – we debunked the Jersey Devil legend…”

“Are you in pain?” Charlie asked, going on tip-toes to better see Clint. 

“Nah. I’m perfectly fine, little man!”

“Of course he is fine. They gave him painkillers. Snored all the way from the infirmary of Avengers Tower…” Barney hissed between clenched teeth. Just because he had recently made up with Clint – as much as they could,giving their history – it didn’t mean that everything was good between them. Especially when his significant other spent more time fussing about Clint than the supposed love or her life. 

“Stop that, Charles Bernard Barton! Clint, he was just teasing you. You know how your brother is.” She allowed Clint to lean on her, and helped him inside. Once there, the archer stared in disbelief at the dining table, where he saw all kind of food. He was speechless, and, as reading his mind, Simone kindly smiled. “Your friend Natasha dropped something up this morning. And all the other tenants, too- Deke, Aimee and Charlize, too.”

A bit disappointed, Clint looked at the food. Simone had mentioned everyone, and yet, who he wanted to see, who he wanted to have gotten food from, wasn’t there, and, apparently, she hadn’t dropped anything for him. 

“Say, Simone, did anyone called?”

She immediately understood where he was going, and smiled. “Amanda called a few minutes ago. Asked me if I knew if you were back yet. I told her you didn’t, and that she’d call you back.”

Clint agreed with a small smile. Helped by his brother and his kind neighbor, he opted to sleep the drugs off on the couch. When he was finally alone, he sighed, feeling as relieved as he hadn’t felt in days,at peace. 

A plant was bathing in sunlight on the coffee table, and he lifted an eyebrow, quizzically \- it hadn’t been there when he had left for his fishing trip. He leaned forward, spotted a small card and he pulled it out.

_ I hope you’re feeling better. I’ll see you as soon as I’ll have five minutes for myself. Love, Amanda. _

Love, Amanda? Had she really signed the note like that? 

The words eased his pain, and as he leaned with his head against the pillows, he smiled, and fell asleep.

***

Late at night, alone in her bed, Amanda hadn’t had the courage to go and confront Clint yet. She rolled over, tried to sleep, but knew she would have just been through another sleepless night. 

She stood in bed, listening to the sounds from the outside, and thinking. 

She loved Clint Barton – was in love with him. She just had to accept it. Yet another thing in her life that had changed drastically in the last few weeks. And she needed to tell him the truth. That it wasn’t a game any longer, that if they were to kiss, it would have been real – probably had been real all along.

She wanted to see him, it was like a physical need. And yet, she knew they were going to need some privacy, and, according to what Natasha had told her over the phone, Clint’s tenants were always around checking on their resident Avenger. The former Russian spy was full of expectations and suggestions about how things were supposed to go between Amanda and Clint, making the scientist think about the archer the whole time. Not that she needed any help in that department. Clint Barton was always on her mind.

His cocky grin. His sense of humor. How fierce and protective he was of those he cared about. The way his muscles flexed when he was firing one of his arrows. How sexy he had been on their date, with the shirt and the jeans and the jacket. How sweet he had been when he had helped her moving her things, and offered to cook her something. 

And then, her mind flashed back to that night, when she had found him half-asleep in the Avengers lounge, injured and in pain. But she had held his hand for hours, watching him sleep, until she knew she had to leave. Not because she had too much to do, but because he had seen already too much in her eyes – and she wasn’t ready to voice her feelings yet. But now, it was different. 

She didn’t know how Clint fell about her, but she was aware it was time go all in, and prey and hope he would feel the same.

***

It was Friday when the doctors gave Clint a clean bill of health, over a week after his accident with the devilish aliens. All he craved was solitude, some peace and quiet, after having been traumatized by the amount of people constantly checking on him, like he had never been injured before. Like being a super-hero wasn’t his business. 

He needed only one person, and yet, Amanda hadn’t been there to see him. All week. He had even toyed with the idea of going to see her, but he couldn’t walk in his sorry state, and Barney had stolen his car. Again. 

Simone had often being there, her kids too, and his dearest best friend, Nat, as well. The women were starting to become friends, he had noted, which was good for them. Natasha didn’t have enough normal people in her life, and Simone, as far as he knew, didn’t have any girlfriend, let alone the other “soccer mums”, but she guessed she needed to unwind to someone who wasn’t into diapers and potty schedules every once in a while. They had both been there that very afternoon, telling him that, as he was fully healed, they were giving a small party. 

Great, more people over – like he hadn’t had plenty of those lately.

Why hadn’t Amanda called? He kept thinking about her note. He couldn’t concentrate. His mind kept going back to Tony’s surrogate sister, her gentle touch, her tender kiss.He knew he loved her, knew he was a little bit pathetic, but he wondered if what he had seen in her eyes was true, or a byproduct of his own feelings. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if he was ready for another relationship, not after Laura. It wasn’t just for the pain her loss had caused him, it was the guilt no one but Natasha knew about.

Fact was, his marriage had seemed perfect on paper: high school sweethearts, married immediately after graduating, gone through life together, no matter what. But not everything had been easy. Laura, in time, had come to resent him and his job, and even if they had been ready to add up to their family at the time of her death, Clint hadn’t been sure it would have been a good idea. The night of the crash they had had an argument, and Laura had left slamming the door at her back. Her last words to him had been “Go to hell, Clint Barton”, and they would have stayed with him forever.

What if he broke Amanda’s heart just like he had broken Laura’s? 

What if Amanda didn’t even love him? Maybe, when she had signed the note with the word love, she meant that she cared about him. Like a sister. Or a friend. Maybe he was just like Tony in her eyes.

“All right, idiot. Go take a shower and get ready. People’s gonna be here any minute now.” Natasha sad, gently slapping him on the back of the head, smiling. “And by people, I mean one miss Amanda Heart.”

Natasha looked sweetly at him, her green eyes almost glassy with unshed tears for her long-time friend – her sole family. She had loved many men in her life, she was building a life together with Bruce, but Clint remained the most important person in her life. He had freed her from the Red Room’s programming, talked her into turning her life around, and use her unique talents for the betterment of the world instead of a means to an end.

She cupped his cheek, as he was a child. “Clint, what happened to Laura, it’s not your fault. I know you know it. And she didn’t hate you – all couples go through some issues, one time or another. She loved you, and she would have wanted for you to move on.”

Sobbing, Clint hugged his friend, and buried his head in the cascade of her red majestic hair, giving up on a little piece of his soul.He admitted defeat. Natasha was right: it was time to move on with his life, and embrace love yet again.

For the first time in years, Clint Barton didn’t feel the phantom weight of a ring that was no longer around his finger.

***

Amanda hadn’t planned of seeing Clint again for the first time at a party filled with people, many of them she didn’t even know, but Pepper and Natasha had talked her into going. Ellie had even chosen a new dress, a robin eggshell soft number with short sleeves, and a pair of nice stiletto heels – nude pumps - that, strange but true, weren’t killing Amanda’s tiny feet. 

When she arrived, the door of the apartment was wide open, the party was in full swing and there was people coming and going; among the crowd, Amanda spotted Simone, Barney’s girlfriend, who gave her a friendly wave. The bundle of energy immediately greeted the scientist, as cheerful as few other people. 

“Someone’s having fun, uh?” Amanda asked, as Simone dragged her into the kitchen, linking their arms. In the last few weeks, Amanda had discovered that, despite the age difference and the fact that Simone had responsibilities that Amanda couldn’t even begin to fathom,she was a woman it was extremely easy to talk to, filled with empathy… and that she honestly cared about Clint, almost like he was another one of her kids. 

“Oh, sure. I do love a good party, but, my dear friend, tonight I’ve got something else to celebrate other than Clint’s recovery…” She showed Amanda a small diamond on her ring finger, shoving the piece of jewelry in the woman’s eyes. “Guess what? Barney proposed, and I said yes!” 

“That’s great! Congratulations!” Amanda said, in Barney’s general direction. He had a still full bottle of cold beer in his hands, and, with all the attention he was getting, he hadn’t even been able to taste a single drop. 

“Uh, thank you.” He just said, nodding, and blushing, clearly not used to the attention – apparently, despite the years in the carnie circuit, Clint had been the party animal, and not his little brother..

Amanda was about to add something else, maybe even shake his hand, when she felt someone dragging her away, grabbing her elbow from behind her. When Amanda turned, she met the green eyes of a very mischievous, very grinning Natasha, who seemed a bit tipsy despite the Russians’ well known resistance to alcohol.

“You, my dear girl, made me a rich woman right now. Pepper said you would have been a no-show. That you aren’t a party person. I told her that you wouldn’t have missed this one party for nothing in the world. You’re way too fond of our party boy.”

Amanda blushed as she saw the glint in Natasha’s eyes. The Russian was a spy,and extremely good at reading people. Of course she had always been aware of theblossoming feelings that Amanda had done her best to not think about and hide in a deep and secluded corner of her heart. “Speaking of Clint… where is he?”

“He must be somewhere with the kids. Jess – I don’t think you’ve met her yet, Jessica Drew – came along with her kid, too. And children love Clint. Probably because he can be an overgrown kid himself at times.”

Just in that moment, someone laughed, and Amanda recognized the voice. She would have done so anywhere. She turned, and saw Clint entering the apartment from the small balcony French door, with Simone’s kinds and a three or four years old, as blonde as him. A gorgeous black-haired woman was at his side, and she was laughing at something Clint had just said. 

A stab of jealously sliced through Amanda’s soul, much more painful and powerful than anything she had ever anticipated nor experienced in her life. Adam, the man she had almost married, had taken her for granted the whole time, and had been more interested in her lineage than anything else. He liked to flirt, and wasn’t shy about doing so even in front of his significant other. And yet, Amanda had never truly cared, never knew the pain she was feeling right about now.

“Amanda…” As soon as he noticed, _felt_ , her presence, Clint turned in Amanda’s direction, and their eyes locked. With a broken and low voice, he whispered her name, like a prayer, his azure eyes wide open in surprise. He swallowed, unable to break the silence, hoping that his gaze alone would tell herhow much it meant to him having her there, at his side, talking with his friends as she belonged there.

Amanda blushed, glad she had been talked into going – and if Natasha’s looks were of any indication, she would have been there, no matter what. Smiling, without saying another word, Clint put an hand on the small of her back, making them both shiver at the contact,and he guided her to the couch, where someone offered them a plate of something.

They just sat there, together, at each’s side, in comfortable silence, stealing secret glances and small touches whenever people wasn’t looking their way.

***

“Ehy, super-hero.” Amanda greeted him, finding Clint on the balcony. The apartment was almost empty, and all they both wanted was peace and quiet. But not being alone. They just needed privacy, and Clint had figured that the small balcony would have done – he just couldn’t wait for everyone to go away. He needed to talk with Amanda, asap. 

“Hey.” He answered. He smiled, almost blinding her with his inner light, his radiant smile reaching his eyes. “Things are starting to get quiet over there, uh?” She nodded, leaning against the banister at Clint’s side; he had his arms crossed, laying them over the metallic bar, and he was looking at the billions of lights coloring the night

“Simone told me Barney proposed and she said yes.” She told him. “I have the feeling that, despite this whole Cain and Abel thing you and Barney got going on, he’ll ask _you_ to be his best man.”

“He already did, actually. And, I gotta tell you – as weird as it, I’m happy for them.” Clint smiled even more if possible, and chuckled. “In my wildest dream, they take an honeymoon all over the world, and when they get back, they move far away from here. I love Simone and I just adore playing uncle for her kids, don’t get me wrong, but I need to take my brother in extremely small doses. Otherwise, we start trying to kill each other. For real. I got the scars to prove it.”

Silence fell between them, comfortable and filled with meaning,and they just looked at each other for the longest time. Then, finally, Clint spoke. “You know, when I lost Laura, it drove me mad. It wasn’t just that I felt guilty because we had argued, it was… the fact that I felt like I lost a piece of me. I swore off love, promised myself that I would have never allowed someone to make me feel like that again. But then… then you burned your coffee, Amanda, and, and I just haven’t been able to get you out of my head. I feel for you, Amanda – pretty hard.” 

Amanda blushed, looked at her feet. “There was smoke, and I was wearing old jeans, an awful t-shirt and my hair was a mess. I was just so plain… how could _you_ have fallen for me that day?”

“Oh, trust me, honey, you were beautiful. That’s the picture I’ll always carry in my heart. The very first time I saw you. When our kids will ask me when I feel in love with their mum, that’s the story I’ll tell them.”

“You could have said something sooner. You would have saved us a lot of troubles.” She shyly said, biting her lips. “I came that close to playing _he loves me, he loves me not_ with one of my daisies just to see if you truly were interested in me.” 

“I told you, self-preservation. I was fighting my own feelings. But I’m not strong enough to look at you giving in to someone else’s advances.”

Amanda chose to stay quiet and allow his words to sink in. Clint loved her. And he wanted to build a life, a future, a family, together. With her.

“I think I may have to reevaluate my stance about not needing a man in my life right now.”

“Good,” Clint approved, lifting her chin with his index. “Cause, baby, you’re stuck with me now. For life.”

She nodded, her eyes teary. “When you got hurt fighting those monsters, it was a wake-up call for me. I almost lost you, Clint. And you would have never known how much I loved you. How much I l _ove_ you.”

His eyes widened and he saw the love in her eyes, all over her features, and he showed that same love back to her. He wasted no time, andfolded her into his embrace. She rested her head against his heart, listening to his steady beat. He lifted an hand, and gently stocked her hair as he nuzzled her. 

“You love me?” He asked, still scared that it couldn’t be true. And she nodded. His mouth touched her for the sweetest kiss. “I’m happy you moved here, Amanda. Thank you very much for having accepted to work for Tony.”

She smiled. “It’s pretty amazing that our paths crossed like that, uh?”

He nodded. “Yeah. Pretty amazing. Did I mention that I love you yet?”

Her laugher filled the room, and then she stood on her toes to place a quick kiss on his lips.

In that moment, with his dog asleep at his feet, his friends and family happy in his apartment and the woman he loved in his arms, Clint thought that life couldn’t get any better. 

***

“Amy, sweetheart, could you open the door, pretty please?”Clint knocked at the door of Simone’s bedroom, and Amanda cracked the door open and smiled, Clint’s heart did some funny dance inhis chest, and he almost forgot why he was there in the first place. 

“You are not supposed to see the bride before the wedding, honey.”

“That only apply to the groom. I’m the best man.”

“Oh. Right.” Amanda blushed, and once the door was fully open, she slipped her arms around his neck and they kissed. Languidly. “Thanks. I really needed that. Ellie’s bad enough, but Simone’s kind of a train wreck. She is - what’s the world? A Bridezilla?”

He exhaled deeply, and then laughed, a bit awkward. “Glad I could save you from this nightmare. You know me – anytime you need me, just think about me, and I’ll be there.”

She placed an hand on his shoulder, the other over his heart; despite the fabric, she could feel her favorite sound in the world, Clint’s steady heartbeat. “You know, you never told me what you wanted, super-hero.”

“Yeah, well, someone distracted me and I forgot what it was.” She laughed. “No, seriously, you look amazing in this dress. One of Ellison’s?”

“Yep. Blue chiffon, French, fifties.” She twirled around and the bottom of the dress swirled at the movement. “I really have to get back in there and help the bride now, though.”

Smiling, Clint reached for her right hand, and he brought it to his lips, kissing the palm, running a finger over the engagement ring, 

“Have I thanked you for agreeing to be my wife?” Amanda laughed and hugged him again. “Anyway, how’s the bride doing? She’s finally getting cold feet and decided that Barney’s not worth the trouble?”

Amanda shook her head and elbowed him in the side, playfully. She got back to Simone, Clint hot on her heels; Simone was sitting on her bed, with a knee length white-off dress with long sleeves, her hair arranged in an intricate knot of some sort that made her neck look longer and slimmer, she had no make-up, no jewels, save for the engagement ring.

“Clint, sweetie, you aren’t having cold feet about being Barney’s best friend, aren’t you?” She chirped as she greeted him.

“Not at all.” Clint reached into his jacket and pulled out a small jewelry box, red and gold, and he offered it to the bride, making her cry. “I got you something new to wear when you marry my brother.” He opened the box; inside, rested a pair of small earrings. It was clear they weren’t the real deal, but they were the kind of costume jewelry that didn’t come cheap and was tasty and classy, with turquoise and emerald-like charms. 

“Oh, Clint, they are lovely. Not that I had any doubt about your taste when it comes to jewels- Amanda’s ring is just gorgeous!” As Simone said so, Amanda blushed, and her eyes fell on her engagement ring; she run her thumb over the delicate pink pearl, entranced by the violet amethysts, her birth stone, surrounding it. The rose gold jewel wasn’t a classic engagement ring, but Amanda loved Clint even more for this – it was unique, just like they were, just like their love was. Besides, it really went well with her new favorite earrings: two small rose gold arrows.

Clint blushed, wishing to change argument and stop the constant teasing about how long it had taken him to just admit that he liked the girl. “Welcome to the family, Simone. I hope you and Barney will make each other very happy, and will have a long and happy marriage.”

“Thank you, Clint.” Simone agreed, sniffing a little, as Clint glanced at his watch.

“All right, ladies, I’ll leave you to finish. Fifteen minutes until you become Mrs. Charles Bernard Barton, Simone. You still have time to change your mind- just saying.”

Amanda slipped her arms through his as he headed for the door. Outside the room, she placed her arms around his neck again. “You now, Hawkeye, you just did a very sweet thing.”

“That’s just what I want you to believe, honey. But I’m a bad guy at heart.” Clint chuckled, his arms around her waist, bringing her closer for a passionate kiss. “Simone’s beautiful, but I know you’ll be the most beautiful bride ever on our wedding day.”

“Oh, I know – I mean, you should see the dress Ellie helped me pick up.” She left a kiss on the corner of his mouth, then, whispered. “And even better it’s what she got me to wear _underneath –_ trust me, you’ll love it.”

Clint lifted an eyebrow, smirking. “Let me guess: some purple little number?”

Amanda tsk-tsked him, pinching his chin delicately. “Oh, Clint, you are so easy to please sometimes…” 

He swallowed knowing he had been right, trying to imagine Amanda taking her wedding dress off and remaining in just her lacy purple lingerie for him; but then, he laughed, shaking his head, and smiling, he added, . “I love you, Amanda Heart. From the bottom of my heart.”

“Me too,” She smiled, giving him a quick kiss. “Me too.”


End file.
